To the leering men out there,
Yes, I see you. I notice when I look up the second and third time as I'm walking by, and you're still staring me down in a manner that sends red flags up in my brain. Maybe you want me to feel uncomfortable enough to nervously smile in your direction and quicken my pace as I hope that you won't approach me or follow me from a distance.
You know, that must be exactly what you want, correct? Because I would not, nor would anyone else with an ounce of decency in their mind, assume otherwise, especially in this day and age. We hear the horror stories of men like you on the news who are often prosecuted as sex offenders and rapists far too late for many of the poor women that you prey on. Or there are those of you who never even make it to that point and get away with being the reason that women feel the need to carry their car keys in their hands like weapons and pink pepper spray containers as key chains. There are those of you who are, unfortunately, never even called out or reprimanded for being tasteless and foreboding in the eyes of the opposite sex.
Any woman can point someone like you out on the street, regardless of her race, sexual orientation, cultural upbringing, or nationality. You sit on benches in the neighborhood parks and you lean against brick walls in the cities. Sometimes, you blatantly stare 15-year-old girls up and down in fast food restaurants, so obvious that their mothers make them wrap up the rest of their meals and head to the car, not answering their daughters question of, "Mom, why did we have to leave so quickly?" until the minivan door clicks shut. You are the scum that put kind, respectful men to shame when witnessing or hearing of your disrespectful actions.
Your leering brings to mind a particular phrase that boils my blood: "Oh, boys will be boys."
Our culture perpetuates your feeble-minded male gaze, and women are taught to be on constant alert for creeps like yourselves. From the age of 6, a little boy pulling a little girl's hair is romanticized. Mommy and Daddy tell her to tell the teacher, and her teacher says, "Robbie must just have a crush on you, sweetie. Boys are like that."
Robbie isn't punished, and deep down somewhere, that little girl often unconsciously learns to associate disrespect with love.
Soon, the 17-year-old girl walking down the street is approached by a 27-year-old man, and when he asks how old she is, he tells her how much of a piece of "jailbait" she is. She feels mildly uncomfortable, but also satisfied because an older guy thinks she's attractive.
And you go on believing that you're not in the wrong. You keep pushing boundaries because no one has set any for you, regardless of whether or not you should have learned what respect for women was a long time ago.
So to you leering men, I hope you know that we see you. I hope you know that we will take appropriate measures to defend ourselves if need be from your stares and borderline-stalking behaviors that make women's skin crawl. I really hope you realize that I will call you out in a public space for making me feel reduced to nothing, and more importantly, I really hope you do this at the wrong place and at the wrong time so you get what's coming to you.
If you leer, you're not a man, and I pray to God that'll get through your thick skulls someday.