Dear Anthony,

This doesn't feel real. No matter how many papers you're in or websites you're on it still doesn't seem real. The last time I saw you, I was walking you to the Wells van to go back to Ithaca. You came to visit and party with us. This is what we said to each other.

"Okay bro we need to meet again, are you going home for break?'

"I don't know but if I do I'll hit you up"

"Okay I love you"

"I love you too sis"

Then we hugged each other. I didn't know that that would be the last full conversation I would have with you. But I am happy that I got to tell you that I love you. That weekend was perfect. Alison, Bentley, Alyssa and I went to Ithaca commons to go get you I was so happy. When we went to Starbucks to meet you, you had the biggest smile on your face. You were happy too. Most of the memories I have with you though are from high school. In 9th grade you were one of four or five boys in a class filled with girls. I remember me thinking you were so young and little and you never talked. As we grew older I found a friend in you. From the African dance freshman year in Ms. Samuel's class to the monologues senior year in Ms. Duffy's acting class. We were close. You were and still are my brother. When I walk around Wells now I think of the places we went on campus and the spots I stood at with you. Our first night at Wells we got lost looking for a building. At the fly-in program we had different hosts and you came back to me the next day telling me how much fun you had the night before. They took you to one of the off campus houses, you were so happy. I called you a fake brother for not calling me and telling me because the night before I was so bored. Other than that we always stuck together. Every time we met someone new we introduced ourselves as siblings and people actually believed us! One boy even asked us if we were twins and we looked at him like he was crazy. One thing I think everyone can say about you Anthony is that you were driven. You were willing to do any hard task to get to the top. You were going to be a business man. I remember when you got your Ithaca business cards in the mail and you showed me. I was like damn you're official brother. The funniest thing ever was when Kayara and I went against you and made the group A.K to go against LFK. She was my fake girlfriend and you never liked that. I remember I would always be on you about having a double life because you had two phones. I would say "Anthony what do you need two phones for?" . You would say "Because I'm a business man sis I need two phones". Hey, remember the time we were supposed to go out as a group but Kerry and some other people didn't show (BTW Kerry you still owe Angela and I a date) and we went to Shake Shack? That was the first time I had ever been there. I remember you walked me to the train that day. Sitting here writing this I feel very heartbroken because I am going to miss you so much. I want to let you know that I decided to not attend your funeral bother. I don't want that memory. I want to remember your smile, your laugh and your tight hugs. Something that I won't be seeing, hearing or feeling at your funeral. That's why I went to your memorial. It was hard for me to get my words out but I spoke hoping that my tears weren't getting in the way of you hearing me up there. I remember I would call you conceited all the time and you would say "I'm not conceited I'm confident". You had such a good way with words brother, you would have made a wonderful business man. I am going to miss you so much and I love you. I will ALWAYS be your sister .. I will never forget your words.

"Have to put on the best. Have to bring the best .. to be the best"

I will make you proud Anthony .. I will make you proud. Te quiero mucho mi manito.

XOXO Aaliyah