Dear Ana,
Good day, Old Friend. How are you doing? Are you still aggressively counting calories with the girl in the mirror? I hope you have enough storage on your phone for all of those fitness apps. What about eating greasy? From what I remember, mozzarella sticks and french fries would never cross your chapped lips. Even cran-raspberry juice was a fear food. Are you allergic to anything with flavor? Food is fun, Ana, and you shouldn’t restrict yourself from so much and you shouldn’t stop the girl in the mirror from partaking in it as well.
It’s been four years of this and I think it is time for you to let loose. Relax and stop tightening up. Stop pulling out her hair and biting off her nails, or damaging her thin wrists. She doesn’t deserve this. Haven’t you looked at her? She’s gorgeous.
Oh? You disagree?
That’s unfortunate, because I've noticed that something magical has happened. That girl you used to be best friends with has finally grown up. No more plank board body or acne prone skin. She’s full of curves and hips that could bare beautiful babies one day. Her face has filled out giving her chiseled cheekbones along with a smile that is etched so deeply in her face, I’m surprised she hasn’t bled out.
Ana, it is time.
Fly far from here and stop coming back. Delete those apps, get rid of her scale and toss away all those pictures you cut out and posted up on her wall. She doesn’t need you anymore. She desires much more from life than to be a size zero. She wants to be healthy and enjoy her favorite foods once more. Ice cream, cheese fries and a thick piece of steak are some of the few things she will be eating now. You have no control over her anymore and with that being said, I think she is ready to move forward.
Goodbye, Ana.
Nothing would have prepared me to witness this transformation. She is finally a year clean. No more starving until her ribs pop from her chest or until there is a five inch gap between her legs. No more crying herself to sleep over the fact that she will not look like one of the “pretty girls." She is a pretty girl, as is any girl. Thin, thick, short, tall; we all come in different shapes and sizes and it is disgusting that you, Ana, tried to turn her into something she wasn’t. I know her better than anyone else because every day I wake up and see her first. She stands above my bathroom sink every morning, giving me a pep talk, reminding me that today is worth it, tomorrow is worth it and the future is worth it. On that note, Ana, I'm locking my doors and keeping you away because we are both ready to move forward and survive.