(Trigger Warning: This article mentions racism and contains an image from "12 Years A Slave.")

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Dear Allies,

I know you want to help and I know how you are for equality and equity, wanting it to be accessible to everyone, but please, for the mother of all goodness, listen to a marginalized member when they call you out for being problematic or contradictory. For instance, if a person of color says that you posted something racist on Instagram, do not defend the reason you posted it and justify why it needed to be posted. Firstly, try to understand why you offended them. Secondly, if you're confused as to why you offended them, ask them respectfully why it's offensive. Thirdly, if they are upset with you, do not tone police them. They have every right to be upset with what you posted, since what you posted could've been triggering for a traumatic experience they endured. Lastly, do not invalidate their feelings, because your privilege doesn't allow you to endure the repercussions of your offensive post.

Last week, an Instagram LGBT+ page I follow posted something I viewed as anti-black. I felt they justified white supremacy with fake, illegitimate science. How does science even mix with mermaids?

This post was not only anti-black, but it partook in the erasure of other people-of-color groups (Indigenous, South Asians, East Asians, Native American, Middle Eastern, Latino/a). A person of color is not just a black person. Plus, Ariel had a woman-of-color friend, by the way! So, their claim of throwing in science with something made up was instantly debunked.

When I commented my concern with the post, several users, who claimed to be pro-black, said I was complaining about something so trivial and dismissed me as an oversensitive social justice warrior that should focus on "actual racism." Some even had the audacity to tell me what I should and shouldn't view it as racist and anti-black. All the users were white. Not only that, some threw in their struggles to silence black struggle.

This is what they all looked like, trying to silence me on my concerns.

As a black woman, I do not enjoy a white person trying to invalidate my feelings.

Allies, if a marginalized member says something is offensive, do not get defensive and become a victim of your privileged fragility. At times, I'm problematic to the LGBT+ community, mental illness/disorder community, and disabled community, and I get called out on it. I have to check my privilege all the time.

Sincerely,

A woman of color who knows what's racist