It's pretty safe to say that Amy Schumer is everyone's spirit animal. Her laugh-out-loud persona and delirously hysterical jokes somehow manage to explain every awkward and uncomfortable situation you might ever find yourself in. For every college student, midterms season is definitely one of the most treacherously uncomfortable times of the year. So without further ado, here's the reigning queen of comedy to explain midterms in a nutshell.
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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
1. The Freshmen 15? It's real.
WARNING: The buffet style campus dining spots are a TRAP. If you're eating and out drinking on the weekends, it is EXTREMELY LIKELY that you're going to gain a little bit of weight. Gaining weight isn't really a bad thing, but staying healthy is definitely important. Take a walk or a run to even out that junk food intake, but feel free to sneak that late night five-cheese panini at 1AM.
2. Make friends with some of your floormates.
Your first year of college is arguably the most memorable time of your college life. You live with your floormates for two semesters, and you see them in the hall all the time. Make it a point to say "what's up", it'll definitely make your year more fun.
3. College is hard. Don't sell yourself short.
Higher education. It's not high school, your professors are a little less prominent than your HS teachers. This being said, you are responsible for your own eucation. It's a little hard having all this freedom and responsibility for (probably) the first time in your life, but it's important to realize that it's a little harder because you're sort of on your own.
4. You don't HAVE to have sex to "get it over with".
This is IMPORTANT. Deciding to have sex when you get to college? Cool. Deciding you want to wait? Awesome. Having sex because you just want to get it over with? Hm, think about that. Your decision is your decision, but if you're iffy about entering the "college hook-up culture", PLEASE really think about how important it is for you to have sex.
5. Be careful who you hook up with and who you open up to.
As I said earlier: beware of the infamous "college hook-up culture". IMO, it's a chance for college guys or gals to lead the other on (the majority of the time). It's not possible to control your feelings, but it's possible to cut a hook-up off/talk about how you feel. Better for you in the long run, trust me.
6. Work around scheduling a class before 12PM.
You might have the idea that, "Oh, I got up at 8AM in high school. I can do it again." No. No, you can't. I have very little explanation for this. You'll enjoy the extra sleep. If you don't believe me, schedule a morning class, and see how you feel.
7. Dress how you want to dress.
You wanna dress up? Slap on some make up, put on some heels, and head to your lecture. You were up late last night? Roll out of bed in what you fell asleep in last night. The good thing about college? You realize that no one is really focused on you, so it's a good time to just "do you" and rock it.
8. The drinking every chance you get? Not healthy. Stop that.
9. When you DO go out, be safe.
Check your drink, make sure you're pacing yourself, don't wander home by yourself, etc. The essentials.
10. Spend your money frugally.
Living the ramen/ easy-mac life is a real thing. There's a reason why it's a college student's go-to: it's easy to make, and it's cheap as heck. It's important to practice money saving tips- even though it seems almost impossible.
11. Those events your RA hosts? Go to them. Some of them are awesome, some offer free food.
As a poor college student, the word free resonates in all of our ears. RA events are not only a gateway to free food, but are also a way to meet more people on your floor/ in your building.
12. It's not all about school- enjoy yourself.
College is a new time in your life where you're working towards your future, but it's also a time where you meet people and have experiences like no other. Let yourself breathe sometimes, and just enjoy this experience.
StableDiffusion
What about combined income from two minimum-wage workers? Wouldn't that put them above the poverty line? In a nuclear family with two working parents and two children, their combined yearly wage would be about $30,160. That's only $7,846 above the poverty line. Now, let's take into account rent, food, gas, utilities, car insurance, health insurance, school supplies, clothes, and tuition. Try and see how $30,160 would cover all those expenses in a year – it doesn't. The minimum wage is not a living wage.
The minimum wage is not a living wage.
StableDiffusion
Here are some myths that I would like to present and debunk:
Raising the minimum wage will kill jobs. This is false. In a March 2011 report, the Center for Economic and Policy Research concluded that raising the minimum wage would not only help workers but actually have the possibility of increasing job openings. Better pay leads people to spend more money, and the cycle repeats.
"Nobody living in one of the most influential nations in the world should be worried about making ends meet."
influential nations
StableDiffusion
On June 2, 2014 , Seattle changed the city's minimum wage to $15 dollars. Following that procedure, unemployment decreased 17.46 percent – falling from a previous 6.3 percent to 5.2 percent.
Raising the minimum wage will hurt small business. Not only has a higher minimum wage worked in cities across the United States, but a 2006 study by the Center for American Progress and Policy Matters compared small business performances and found that the small businesses who paid the higher wages were more profitable.
Mostly teenagers work minimum-wage jobs. Again, this is false. Half of minimum-wage workers are 25 years old or older. Most minimum-wage workers support their family on this income – and 28 percent of these individuals have children.
Raising the minimum wadge
The minimum wage is not sufficient to uphold and support an individual, especially individuals with families. I've often heard: "It isn't fair that someone working in a fast food restaurant will get paid the same as a college professional!" If we raise the minimum wage to, let’s say, $11 an hour, it would still be a lower amount than that of a college professional. Even so, someone not having a college degree doesn't make their worth any less valuable. Nobody deserves to live in poverty. Nobody living in one of the most influential nations in the world should be worried about making ends meet. We are a nation of equality and opportunity – it's time to let some of that opportunity flow.
What is the current minimum wage at the federal level?
Federal minimum wage is currently $7.25 per hour. Many states also have minimum wage laws, and the employee is entitled to the higher of the two minimum wages. (U.S. Dept. of Labor)
What are the benefits of raising the minimum wage?
A higher minimum wage means less workers living below the poverty line, more workers being able to make ends meet and potentially spend beyond that, and workers would be more productive upon the increase.
What are the states that have set a $15/hour minimum wage?
California is at $15.50 per hour, Washington is at $15.74, and Massachusetts is at $15. These are the only states to have a $15 minimum wage as of Jan. 1, 2023. (The Economic Policy Institute Tracker)
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