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Health and Wellness

American Horror Story: Tutwiler Edition

For those of us who have had the horror of living in the Tutwiler dorm, we know all of the following things to be true.

Emily Moessner

Mar 02, 2015

The University of Alabama

196

You know that it is impossible to leave your room after 9 p.m in your pajamas, without being judged by the girls going out -- on a Monday.

Sorry for doing my homework -- okay, I am actually watching Netflix, but I swear I have My Labs Plus open in a different tab!

You know the ultimate struggle that is doing laundry. At any one time, four washers and two dryers will be broken, and dryers D6 and D7 will eat your money because they only accept coins. I fall for this. Every. Time. I have lost at least $20 to those stupid machines!

Thursday nights in Tut are their own kind of horror story.

This is because it is swap night which means that one girl is wearing some kind of sexy nerd costume, one is dressed like a hobo, and another is barely wearing clothes at all. They don’t call it "Slutwiler" for nothing.

It is second semester, and by now everyone knows the stair/elevator policy: if you live on floor five, or below, take the stairs; six and up, take the elevator. However, there is always that girl who thinks she is better than everyone else and gets off on the third floor.

Don't even get me started on the girls who take the elevator down from the third floor…

You hear some conversations you wish you could erase from your memory.

Like, no, I actually did not want to know what you did last Friday night in Chi Phi's basement.

The cleaning ladies are the real MVPs.

They clean up the puke, hair, and who-knows-what-else that always manages to find its way into the communal bathrooms. By Sunday nights, we genuinely cannot wait for them to return on Monday.

You will see a girl puking her guts out in the bathroom.

Help her! It doesn't matter how gross it is, if you like her or even know her, she will thank you later.

It will never cease to surprise you the amount of girls who use the bathroom and don't wash their hands.

This is why the Tutwiler plague exists. Wash your hands, ladies! If you don't believe me, go check out @SlutwilerProbz on Twitter.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Health and Wellness

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Make yourself at home, why don't you?

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