'American Horror Story' Has Got Nothing On My Life | The Odyssey Online
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Health and Wellness

'American Horror Story' Has Got Nothing On My Life

Because life is a horror story.

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'American Horror Story' Has Got Nothing On My Life
Bloody Disgusting

OK, so we all know "American Horror Story" ended a couple of weeks ago (fortunately because this season sucked), but does it truly ever end? You turn the television off after watching the preview for next weeks episode and sit on the couch and stare at the wall. You realize your life in general is an American horror story.

You wake up at 8 a.m the next day, roll off the bed, fall down the stairs and trip on ice on the way to your class. The wind is going five hundred miles an hour, the snow is smacking you across the face, and you realize you forgot to put shoes on so your toes fall off. Mondays are the best aren't they?

So your Monday comes to an end. You failed two pop quizzes and have to go home to study for tomorrow's organic chemistry test. But you have to make time to go to the gym, right? You take the half-hour bus ride back to your apartment and run inside to change. Today is cardio, but you can't run on an empty stomach. You turn the stove on and make some chicken. You don't have chicken (or any kind of food) so you get ready to cook ramen.

The gym is packed but there's one treadmill left so you rush over and claim it for yourself. The speed goes from 0.5 to 5.0 and your day suddenly isn't so bad after releasing some endorphins. You're running and watching the television in front of you when all of sudden you go headfirst into the floor. Next time, dry your shoes before you start running on a treadmill! Today just isn't your day. You wipe off the sweat on your brow with your red shirt and start walking to your car. Wait. You weren't wearing a red shirt. Oh! You just broke your nose!

After jump-starting your car and re-wrapping your broken nose and toes, you use your hands to pump the gas and make your way to the apartment. Actually, you need some food so you go to the store. So there you are, in aisle five, getting reduced fat milk, when all of a sudden you have the runs and have to go to the bathroom. You do your thing and flush the toilet, only to realize you flushed your credit card down the toilet. Thank goodness you brought chuckle cheese tokens. Hopefully, they accept them here.

"At the end of the day, you know you're just going to have another day tomorrow, so it's important to be as optimistic as possible. Just because something is the end of the world today, doesn't mean it'll be the end of the world tomorrow. And even if it is, it won't matter a couple of years from now." -- A quote by me.

You step out of your car and carry your milk to the apartment and smell a campfire. Your neighbors didn't invite you to their camp-out mid-February? No fair! You march right up to your door to put your milk in the fridge so you can give your neighbors a piece of your mind. You adjust yourself to get the keys out of your pocket, and reach for the doorknob. Except there is no doorknob. That wasn't a campfire. Your house burned down.

You forgot the damn ramen.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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