I Am Not Ready To Think About Marriage | The Odyssey Online
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I Am Not Ready To Think About Marriage

Honestly, I am too selfish for marriage right now.

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I Am Not Ready To Think About Marriage

This past summer, two of my friends got married. My brothers are both planning on getting married soon. Rings keep popping up on my Facebook and engagement pictures are everywhere. I am twenty years old and in a relationship. This makes people assume that I have started thinking about marriage. Let me be honest, the idea of marriage terrifies me. There is no way I could get married any time soon.

Don't get me wrong; I love weddings. I love the idea of growing old together.I have dreamed of getting married my entire life and yes I do have a Pinterest Board filled with ideas. I am the biggest hopeless romantic that has ever walked the earth. I love all of it, but that does not mean that I am ready for marriage. It means that someday, far in the future, I can experience my own wedding. But I can guarantee you, that I will not get married until I am truly ready for marriage. If I am completely honest, I am not ready for marriage because I am too selfish to get married. I do not want to sacrifice any of my dreams for someone else. I have so much that I want to do before I think about settling down.

I am going to finish my education. I want to grow in my knowledge for myself so that I can be the best version of myself. I am going to travel. I do not want to have to worry about my husband every time that I am away from home. I am going to live alone. I want to learn how to take care of myself. I do not want to be that person that gets married and then finds out that she cannot stand on her own two feet. I am going to be a puppy mom. I want to learn that I can be responsible for someone else in my home. I am going to have a job. I want to have a job that I love and a job that makes me happy. I am going to be content without being married.

I know it sounds awful and I seem super selfish, but I do not want marriage to be something that I just check off of my checklist. I want it to be something that I am ready for. I want to be the best version of myself and the best wife that I can be for my husband. I want to know that I am the best person that I can be before I start my family. My future family deserves the best and in order for me to be the best for my family I need to do what is best for myself.


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