I have always been a relationship oriented girl. Love has always inhabited me. I'd lay around and daydream about the next boy who would walk into my life and sweep me off my feet. One day I seized that opportunity. I fell in love so steadfastly. I immersed myself into this new idea that he was the one for me, that he was the first and last boy that I would ever truly love. Let me just tell you that I was wrong.
Nothing like a good ol' fashioned breakup to smack you back into reality.
Since then I have broadened my horizons and started soul searching. I found this newfound freedom to be liberating. I found something new to be excited about: me.
And so I have realized that I want to be selfish for awhile. This is my time to love myself and figure myself out. I want to put myself together piece by piece until I am whole all on my own. The only commitment I want to make is to myself. And that's okay.
Everyone around me seems to be getting engaged. I am not ready. I am not ready to leap back into a relationship. I am in my 20s. I have my whole life ahead of me and an entire lifetime to be married or in a relationship. Why should I hasten myself to find one when it's not even legitimately up to me? It's all God's timing. When God says it is time for me to be with someone, he will make it happen. And when that does happen, I won't have to daydream anymore because it will be with the right person.
Until then, my heart will remain open to love. But that will never stop me from rejoicing myself first.