I am Demisexual: Get Over it | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Politics and Activism

I am Demisexual: Get Over it

It's real, and you need to stop discriminating against us

50
I am Demisexual: Get Over it
Sam Kenneth Yeskis-West

According to the world, Asexuality doesn't exist.

Newsflash world: Asexuality exists. Not only does it exist, but it is also a spectrum, which means there are many different variations of it, and many different people identify as asexual. Now, many of you are probably rolling your eyes and making jokes like "Oh so are you a plant?" or "So you reproduce with yourself?"

I'm here to tell you that asexuality is a sexual orientation, it is a spectrum, it exists, and it is valid. I myself am demisexual, meaning I can only be in a sexual relationship with someone after forming a close bond. Now, this may seem "regular" and "shouldn't need a title," and to a point, you are almost right. However, while normal, straight passing, and natural, being demisexual isn't easy. Let me put it into perspective for you:

Throughout my whole young adult life, I felt like a freak. There were some nights I would lay in bed, weeping, wondering what the heck was wrong with me. Why was I crying? Because whenever a boy got close to me, held my hand, hugged me, etc, I would flinch. Being touched "that way" made me disgusted and terrified. I could get boyfriends; I was cute and funny, and I could very well be in a situation to have sex. But even the thought of having sex with someone made me squeamish; I felt like crying. While all my friends talked about hooking up at parties or making out with their boyfriends, all I could wonder was "What the hell is wrong with me?"

I have a significant other now, I have a sexual relationship with him. Because I know him. I found out recently that I fall under that asexual spectrum, that the reason I can have a sexual relationship with my significant other is because I love him, completely, which puts me in the demisexual area.

I don't feel like a freak anymore. I don't cry myself to sleep wondering if I'm alone. Sex scenes in movies make me uncomfortable. I only have sex like seven times a year, if that. I am valid.

Anything else? Oh yeah, telling someone they don't need a label, or that their sexuality isn't valid, means you are shoving them back into the closet. Congrats on being cruel to a person who confided in you and trusted you, only to have you tell them that they don't matter.

I am demisexual, and I'm not afraid anymore.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
friends
Photo by Elizeu Dias on Unsplash

If I have learned one thing in my lifetime, it is that friends are a privilege. No one is required to give you their company and yet there is some sort of shared connection that keeps you together. And from that friendship, you may even find yourself lucky enough to have a few more friends, thus forming a group. Here are just a few signs that prove your current friend group is the ultimate friend group.

Keep Reading...Show less
ross and monica
FanPop

When it comes to television, there’s very few sets of on-screen siblings that a lot of us can relate to. Only those who have grown up with siblings knows what it feels like to fight, prank, and love a sibling. Ross and Monica Geller were definitely overbearing and overshared some things through the series of "Friends," but they captured perfectly what real siblings feel in real life. Some of their antics were funny, some were a little weird but all of them are completely relatable to brothers and sisters everywhere.

Keep Reading...Show less
Sorority Girls
Owl Eyes Magazine

College is a great place to meet people, especially through Greek life. If you look closely at sororities, you'll quickly see there are many different types of girls you will meet.

1. The Legacy.

Her sister was a member, her mom was a member, all of her aunts were members, and her grandma was a member. She has been waiting her whole life to wear these letters and cried hysterically on bid day. Although she can act entitled at times, you can bet she is one of the most enthusiastic sisters.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

10 Reasons Why Life Is Better In The Summertime

Winter blues got you down? Summer is just around the corner!

1146
coconut tree near shore within mountain range
Photo by Elizeu Dias on Unsplash

Every kid in college and/or high school dreams of summer the moment they walk through the door on the first day back in September. It becomes harder and harder to focus in classes and while doing assignments as the days get closer. The winter has been lagging, the days are short and dark, and no one is quite themselves due to lack of energy and sunlight. Let's face it: life is ten times better in the summertime.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

10 Things That Describe You and Your College Friends

The craziest, funniest, and most unforgettable college memories are impossible to create without an amazing group of friends.

842
College Friends
Marina Lombardi

1. You'll never run out of clothes when you have at least four closets to choose from.

2. You embrace and encourage each other’s horrible, yet remarkable dance moves.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments