"You're so sweet, and you're everything I want in a guy. Oh my God, you're the perfect guy."
While this is all nice and dandy to hear, there's always a "but" at the end of this conversation. It almost never fails for this to fall through. The truth is, I would drop everything for you, but I have the feeling you wouldn't drop a single thing for me. You say you don't know what you want, but I already do know. I've known since the moment I looked into your blue eyes. Having said this, I know I'll more than likely always be that "nice guy" for you. I'll always be the guy who you say would be great to introduce to your family, but it'll never happen. I'll always be the guy who you say is better than your boyfriend, but you'll probably never leave him. I'll always be the guy who will drop the world just to answer your call, but you'll never answer first. I'll always be the guy to send you things that make me think of you, but you'll never even talk to me first. I'm always going to be this guy to you, and the sooner I realize this, the less pain I'll possibly have to endure in letting you go.
To speak bluntly, I'm exhausted. Terribly, and brutally, exhausted. I'm losing faith, because with each of these "nice things" you tell me, there goes another post of you and your boyfriend. I don't give ultimatums, but I feel that this has to be the case with this. Why do I still care so much, even though I know I shouldn't? It's because I see so much in you. I see so much potential in everything you do. I see that you can be so much better off than you are right now. That's why I stick around for you. It's because I have this hopeless thought you'll realize this, and rid your life of the poison you've been injecting yourself for years now. It's because I feel so incredibly helpless whenever we talk. It's because I don't usually post sappy and romantic things, but you're worth that to me. It's because I understand your anxiety, and I am so grateful I met you two months ago that Halloween night. I've had a past similar to the life you've been living. We connect so quickly and so easily, it's barely an effort for us.
But it's alright, because I'm always the guy who will always be here for you. The guy who will always drop everything to spend a minute with you just so you can vent for whatever you need to. The guy who sacrificed 4 hours of studying just to hear you vent about life, because I didn't mind. Then again, I never really do. It's how I'm wired, and how I'm made. "The Nice Guy" will always be here, don't worry.
