For over the last ten years I have grown up being raised by my dad and grandparents. I love them with all of my heart and I am so thankful I had them in my life. If it weren't for them I would never have become the woman I am today. However, there always seemed to be a piece missing. That piece being my mom. She has not been a part of the picture the majority of my life. I'm not writing this to speak poorly of her because I know she loves me and everything she has done has been for the best. That being said, I would be lying if I said I didn't miss her or that I envy those with doting mothers. That's why I am serious when I say, always tell your mom you love her and don't take it for granted for a single second.
People always ask me about her, what she does, where she lives, and if I have a good relationship with her. I know the answer to the first two but the third one is always a lie. It's easier for me to say that our relationship is good because that means I don't have to talk about it. With a simple yes, I am free of talking about a story I don't feel like sharing. I don't want people to ever feel bad for me or to make my mom seem like the bad guy. There's no reason to feel bad for me because my life is great and I have amazing friends and family so that means there's no reason to give me a pity party.
Nothing makes me sadder than hearing someone speak poorly of their mother. Whether it's because they are being clingy or maybe constantly wanting to take your picture. Your moms do this because they love you and miss you. You have no idea how much I envy seeing moms do those things because I never had that. I didn't have a mom to lead me and help me grow as a woman. I instead was shown all the things that I will never let myself become. So next time you feel like your mom is nagging you, remember she does it because she loves you.
Unless you are in a similar situation you'll never truly get how upsetting it can be when those around you speaking of their moms and you have to sit there awkwardly because you have nothing to add. I am so grateful for the families that have taken me in as one of their own because it has helped make that missing piece seem less obvious.
I generally don't think about my mom. I haven't seen her or spoken to her in so long that it almost feels like a distant memory. However, I have days where it hurts more than usual. Hearing friends talk about their mom or how close they are to them typically is what triggers those buried away emotions. Like I said, this article is not here to make anyone say "Oh, poor Jacque." No, it's quite the opposite. I write this because I want to make sure that everyone remembers to call their mom and tell them you love them. I wish I could do that and maybe in the future I will be able to but as of right now my only hope is to tell people not to take their mom for granted. She loves you, and you need to show her the same. And to those in a similar situation like me, whether it be your mom, dad, or anyone else just remember to keep your head up and love those around you. You are loved even on the days you don't feel like it. So keep marching on with your chin up and a smile on your face. Life always gets better.