Growing up I always liked boys, it's all I would talk about. At a preschool age I was telling my mom that I wanted to kiss a boy that was in my class. But as I grew up I was finding girls more attractive than men. I would find actresses such as Jennifer Lawrence, Blake Lively and Miley Cyrus (pre-craziness) attractive rather than men like the Hemsworth brothers and Ryan Reynolds.

But I came from a family where being gay would not be accepted at all--and to be honest I thought these feelings were normal. Everyone has "girl crushes"--everyone thinks girls can be attractive, right? But that wasn't the case.

I ended up dating a man for almost five years--and I THOUGHT I was happy. I settled. I thought that it was normal that every time he touched me I felt uneasy. And every time he kissed me I wish it would end. I honesty and completely thought all this was normal.

I remember going over to my friend Savannah's house for a sleepover with our friend Abby and I literally remember the moment where it all pieced together--I'll never forget the night. I started crying and I told them that I had realized that I liked girls--and all they could say was that they knew it and when I told other friends all they could say was that they knew it all along.

But I remember thinking to myself--"I'll never date a girl because of how people would view me."

I moved down to Orlando to pursue my dreams of working for Walt Disney World about two years after this night.

I met the girl of my dreams the day I moved there. But I didn't know it than, I mean I did and I had high hopes and dreams but I never thought it would actually amount to anything being that we both "claimed" ourselves as straight.

This girl was like nothing else, she always put me before herself, when I was sad she did everything possible to make me happy, when I grew anxious and felt panic come near she would drop everything to be there (and I did the same thing to her). We would drop everything for each other, she would get sick and I would take care of her and vise versa. She didn't force me to do anything I didn't want to do. She didn't need to spend any money on me at all, she didn't need to buy my friendship. She was essentially perfect--she was my soulmate.

I quickly grew to love this woman, but was too afraid to say anything for fear of rejection from not only her but from others.

One night she kissed me and told me she had always loved me from the very moment she met me. I don't even know if I was able to form words that night. I remember the next day going into work, was the most genuine smile I had probably had in five years or more. I wish everyone could experience this type of smile and this type of happiness.

I was finally happy--after the last five years of my life. The emotional and sexual abuse--I could finally be happy and free and well, me.

Coming out wasn't easy--many people didn't accept me and lots of people were confused being as if I had just dated a guy less than a year ago. But that doesn't mean absolutely anything. I wasn't 100 percent happy than and I definitely was not 100% me. I felt like I wasn't me but I felt like I couldn't do anything about it for risk of being judged for who I really was.

But than she came along--and gave me a hell of a reason.

She gave me a reason to come out and not care about what anyone thinks of me.

She gave me a reason to finally be happy--to finally be free.

I hate the terms "You haven't always been gay" or "You chose this" or "Didn't you date a guy?".

Number One: You do not know what I have or haven't always been- you are not in my mind. You are not my brain.
Number Two: I DID NOT choose this. I would have never chose this- I love this life don't get me wrong. But do you honestly think I would choose to go against the "norm" of the world? Do you think I would choose to work harder just to be able to have a family with my partner because you realize it's going to take thousands of dollars? Do you think I would choose to get ridiculed and singled out by people almost every single day? And do you HONESTLY think I would choose the life that unfortunately people's lives have been taken from them for being gay? I was born this way and I can't change.
Number Three: Yes, I did date a guy and yes, so did my partner before she dated me. Your point? That doesn't mean anything. When a caterpillar turns into a butterfly do you remind the butterfly of what it used to be once it gets there?

I love my girlfriend more than anything in the world and she loves me so that is all that should matter. I am gay and I have always been gay--it just took the right person to come along for me to finally have the nerve to come out. I always knew in the back of my head but I was so "comfortable" and honestly scared to leave this relationship for fear of my peers but also fear of him. All it took was for the right person to come along to make me feel safe and to make me feel proud of who I am.

If you're afraid to come out and feel trapped in your situation don't ever feel like you have no way out. Don't make YOURSELF unhappy just to please others. And don't let anyone try and tell you who you really are.

You fall in love with souls not people.