Have you ever heard the song "Home" by Andy Grammar?
If you have, have you ever really let the words sink in?
This song was my senior class song in high school and I cry every time I hear it now. At the time, the song was an exciting thing. Andy Grammar singing the words "oh no this city won't change us," the excitement of a new place, new friends, new challenges set in. This song used to mean college was close and graduation was closer. But now, with graduation several months deep in my rear view mirror and college a long road ahead, this song brings up a feeling of sadness. Now when I hear the song I catch onto lyrics that I never had before. Lyrics like "we won't forget where we came from," and "here's to the...people who had your back when the world didn't understand." I'm in a new place now. The "people who had [my] back" are now 2 hours away. And I know that doesn't sound like a lot but when those people are everything to you, that distance feels much larger.
I've been a little homesick lately. Not missing home in general but missing my family and the special needs kids I spent 5+ hours a day with for two years. Well, despite being slightly homesick, I've held it together pretty well. I haven't cried, haven't had a breakdown. Until Wednesday. I got a FaceTime call and it was from those very same kids I spent so much time with. They were all bunched up around the camera saying "I love you Laura Beth" and "I miss you." (I like for people to think I'm tough and don't have much emotion in me, but I lost it when I saw that.)
I know that the lyrics of that song rein true, "we always find our way back home." But it's still hard sometimes. So if anyone else out there reading this has been feeling that sadness deep down telling you that you miss your family and friends, I want to let you know that it's okay. It's okay to miss them sometimes. It's okay to cry. It's okay to binge eat pity packs. Because when it really comes down to it, you will always find your way back home. You will never forget where you came from.
"See, we won't forget where we came from, the city won't change us, we beat the same drum. No, we won't forget where we came from, the city won't change us," because "we always find our way back home! Yeah, we always find our way back home."
And to those lovely kids who called me, Miss Laura Beth will always love you and will be home to visit soon!! (I love you all *in ASL*)