With the midterm season in full swing, what better time is there to pull our textbooks out from wherever they have sat collecting dust? I mean, how else could a college student make use of the bound reminders of the struggles we literally pay to put ourselves through? The books we have all regrettably spent hundreds of dollars on could not possibly have any other use. Then again, maybe the following ideas aren’t so bad. If anything, giving them a try is a great way to procrastinate!

1. A coaster or TV tray

How often do you find yourself sitting in front of your TV or computer with a snack in hand and nowhere to set it down? Problem solved! Grab a textbook! It is sure to be at least slightly more stable than your sanity in the middle of midterms.

2. A rather lame pillow

All college students know how critical getting enough sleep can be. If you find yourself needing to make up some hours with the Sandman just position your textbook in front of you and lay down to rest. Admittedly, the hard surface isn’t ideal, so if that doesn’t work, try opening it up and reading a chapter. You’ll be asleep in no time!

3. A step stool

All my fellow short people know what I am talking about. Sometimes a boost is necessary, and textbooks can be stacked up as high as you need them. Could it be more perfect?

4. A form of defense

Picture this: You’re walking down the street and someone hostile approaches you. Who needs pepper spray when you can just flash the cover of your linear algebra textbook at them. If that type of math doesn’t scare them away, hitting them with the two-ton book is also an option.

5. Weights

Who needs to build brain power when you can just build muscle power? Walking around campus with textbooks weighing you down is almost as difficult as actually learning something from them. However, if you’re really looking for something fun try making an exercise routine only using your books. (Arguably) good books = good looks.

Midterm season is a scary time only made worse by the daunting realization that you have not read a single word out of your textbooks. Have no fear, though, that pattern of gross irresponsibly can be continued. Who needs to read them when there are so many other thrilling ways to use the expensive “required” materials.