Have you ever heard people say that you need to love yourself before you love someone else? Or you will find someone when you stop looking and least expect it? Maybe even you need to learn how to enjoy single-hood first? Well, all those words of wisdom may actually be true, although no one ever seems to want to hear them.
As a recent graduate, college has this amazing ability of helping you discover your interests and talents while never truly being alone. The dorms surround you with people, and most people live with roommates in apartments afterwards. Classes provide a variety of people that, even if not true friends, provide human interaction several days a week.
It’s not until you graduate, live alone, and realize most of your coworkers are older, married, and have children, that you know what being alone is like. You’re forced to be content with yourself and silence. Not a big thinker? Well get used to it. You come home everyday to no one, and sometimes you have absolutely no commitments except to make yourself dinner.
All those interests you discovered in college? It’s time to put those to good use in the free time you have. That free time is the same time frame every single day (5pm - bedtime).
I don’t have tips yet of how to enjoy being alone beyond just tolerating it. But I do want to warn those graduating while also empathizing with those that are learning the hard truth. I wrote this because I know that in order to get married and have kids one day, which I couldn’t want more, I need to get through this season.
If you can successfully master being alone, you won’t NEED a relationship. The hope won’t go away, but you won’t feel desperate for affection and attention. You’ll realize you deserve something great, and will know not to settle. The day it shows up will be nothing more than a beautiful blessing.
