My first day of high school might have been five years ago, but I remember it like it was yesterday--and let me tell you, it was definitely one for the books. I was 30 minutes late to school, courtesy of my lovely bus driver, my hair was so frizzy I basically had a bird's nest on my head, and I stained my perfectly white blouse all before second period. My 14-year-old self thought it was the worst day of my life, but looking back at it now as a sophomore in college, I think it's pretty funny. High school might have started out rough for me, but it wasn't all that bad. I learned so much about life during my four years in high school, but I wish I'd realized a few things sooner.

Here's a list of advice to everyone in high school. It's a bunch of things I picked up on fast, and a bunch of things I wish I'd known before even starting high school. I hope you can take at least one piece of my advice to heart.

• It’s not like it is in the movies.
• You’ll start your freshman year with lots of friends, but you’ll end your senior year with a handful of well-trusted friends.
• You might think your high school years are going to be some of the best years of your life. That’s 100% incorrect. Your happiest years are going to be when you’re doing what you love with people you love, and I promise that isn’t going to be during your awkward four years in high school.
• High school might suck for you, but you have to hit rock bottom before things can get better.
• You’re young and have your entire future ahead of you.
• Making good grades is so so so so important!
• Don’t stop in the middle of the hallways and stairways—people will get angry with you.
• ALWAYS be respectful to your teachers.
• Making good grades doesn’t make you a nerd, but calling smart kids ‘nerds’ makes you a bully.
• Speak up for the kid being bullied. How would you feel if it was you? What if it was your little brother or sister?
• Consider your classmates’ feelings.
• It doesn’t matter if you’re introverted or extroverted. Go to every football game, or stay inside with a book. Don’t make yourself do something you don’t want to just because everyone else is doing it.
• You will hear a song one day, and three years later you will still associate it with the same memory of that moment. Sometimes that song will make you sick to your stomach. Sometimes it will make you smile at the past.
• Express yourself. If you can be confident with who you are and how you look, then you will always be happy.
• Relationships don’t matter in high school. Most of them end because it’s high school and everyone is at a different level of maturity. You do not have to be in a relationship just because everyone else is. But if you have feelings for someone and want to be with them, go for it.
• Cry. Your friendship ended? Cry. You failed another algebra test? Cry. It’s healthy. You feel changed—clean—after a good cry. Don’t be afraid to cry. It’s okay to show your emotions.
• Stereotyping and labeling isn’t cool.
• Your peers will drink, do drugs and have sex. You do NOT have any obligation to do the same.
• You are not a prude if you abstain from sex.
• You are not a slut if you have sex.
• Before you do anything, stop and ask yourself, “would my parents be proud if they knew I was doing this?” If the answer is ‘no,’ don’t do it. If the answer is ‘maybe,’ don’t do it. This is a good rule-of-thumb.
• Social media isn’t life.
• Everyone makes 60s on a test every so often.
• Just because your best friend is a size 2 doesn’t mean you aren’t just as beautiful in your size 10.
• Don’t EVER feel bad about what you eat.
• Everyone gets pimples.
• If a boy wants to wear girl clothes, it’s OKAY.
• If a girl wants to wear boy clothes, it’s OKAY.
• T-shirts are comfortable, but you look killer in those nude pumps.
• Body shaming is wrong.
• Love yourself. All of yourself.
• Don’t conform to fit society’s expectations of what you should look like and how you should act.
• It doesn’t matter if you have gay classmate. His or her sexual preferences have nothing to do with you, and he or she does not have to conform to your religious beliefs.
• Your religious beliefs do not make it okay to harass your classmates for being gay, getting pregnant, or making bad decisions.
• Some girls will get pregnant in high school. Don’t treat them like any less of a person.
• Love everyone.
• Be nice; it pays off.
• Talk to your parents. Tell them about your life, about your problems. A healthy relationship between you and your parents is so important. They care and love you.
• Don’t goof off.
• Memorizing MLA format will be super helpful.
• Junior year is hard, but it’s also the most important year.
• You’re not stupid if you aren’t in AP/IB/honors classes.
• Band kids are not geeks.
• Drama is so silly. Gossip is so silly. Don’t pay attention to it. You are better than that.
• Often when people say bad things about you, it is because they are jealous of you and struggle with their own insecurities.
• Always keep a pen handy.
• Be on time to class.
• Never do anything you aren’t comfortable with.
• Don’t peer pressure your friends into doing something they aren’t comfortable with.
• It’s okay if you become emotionally detached. School is challenging and draining, and sometimes you have to step back.
• Take a nap after school.
• Bring snacks—you learn better when your stomach isn’t screaming ‘feed me, feeeeeed me!’
• There comes a point where you have to put the textbook down. Your mental health is more important than your grades.
• If you struggle with depression, please don’t self-harm. Talk to someone, a friend, teacher, or counselor. You’re so important.
• Mental health days are important.
• Become close with a teacher and visit him/her every year. It’s good to have a teacher as a friend. They give great advice.
• Friends will come and go.
• Everything is temporary.
• You’ll find yourself in your senior year, and you will be totally different than you were freshman year.
• Get involved in clubs. You’ll be thankful when it comes time to apply for scholarships and college.
• Colleges look at community service, so it’s smart to get involved. Plus, you will feel like a better person if you volunteer at a retirement home.
• If college isn’t for you, that’s fine. Don’t feel like you are required to go to college. Do what you want. It’s your future.
• Working a job after high school is respectable.
• Not everyone is a math genius. People have different strengths in different subjects.
• Sometimes you need to be alone.
• Sometimes you’ll like being alone rather than being surrounded by friends.
• Skip class at least once. Sometimes you just need a break.
• Everyone has mental meltdowns.
• Treat your siblings right.
• Go out of your way to talk to the kid who sits alone at lunch; you never know when someone needs a friend the most.
• LIFE GOES ON.
• Just because someone has a pretty face doesn’t mean they are kind.
• People clear their heads in different ways: running, music, art, eating, sleeping, crying, etc.
• Practice self-care.
• You matter.
• EVERYONE has feelings.
• Don’t forget how to feel.
• Be kind.
• Sometimes you’ll find music that speaks to your soul. That’s awesome. You aren’t lame for obsessing over a band.
• Find what you’re passionate about.
• Try new things.
• You’re unique. You’re the only you that exists.
• Somebody loves you.
• You aren’t alone.
• Just because someone is rude to you does not mean you get to be rude back.
• Make your parents proud.
• Getting grounded is not the end of the world. The world will not stop spinning if you can’t text your friend back.
• Take your classes seriously. You don’t want to sit in a desk for four years to not graduate.
• Some people have speech impediments. Do. Not. Mimic. Them.
• Be accepting.
• Be understanding.
• Stand up for what you believe in.
• Everyone has a different story; everyone comes from a different background.
• You are not better than your classmates.
• You are not less than your classmates.
• Sometimes you have to be selfish and choose yourself, because every once in awhile, you need to care about yourself.
• The brand of your clothes does not matter.
• Don’t hold a grudge. You’re going to be spending four years with the same bunch of people.
• You’ll start high school determined to be a doctor or a lawyer. Senior year, you’ll be absolutely clueless about what you want to do for the rest of your life. That’s normal. That’s okay.
• Freshman year, sophomore year, and junior year will drag on. You’ll always feel like the previous year was actually 10 years ago (even though it was like three months ago). Then, one day, it will be the day before your last week of high school, and you’ll be completing your last high school assignment. You’ll realize that the past four years went by in the blink of an eye. You might get nostalgic. You might regret a few decisions. You might regret something you didn’t do, wishing you had done it. That’s fine. But just know this: one day you’ll toss your cap in the air, and say, ‘momma, I made it!’
• High school isn’t forever.