"One of my motto's is: 'There's no future in growing up.'" - Carl Boenish, Sunshine Superman
When I was a kid, I had a pretty messed-up vision of what adulthood was like. It seemed awesome, I couldn't wait to have an awesome job and a fun adventurous life, but I always thought there was a pretty fine-line between what you could do as a kid and as an adult. I never saw adults playing video games, wearing non-collared shirts, or getting into random shenanigans with their friends. That's how it is though: when you're a little kid you're young and naive, and make all kinds of crazy assumptions about the world. It is what it is.
As I got older, especially throughout high school and as I went off to college, I started to see more of what adulthood entails. I spent years being subjected to, "I'm afraid to grow up and be a real adult" posts on Facebook as well as college seminar classes where we went over how to dress and talk for an interview or formal presentation. Three and a half years later I'm awarded a bachelor's degree - a proud, happy moment that's severely watered down by having to sit through a long ceremony.
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Suddenly, the fun is over right? Responsibilities kick in, it's time to mature and grow up? Nope. Here's the thing: you have to go to work, and you have to pay bills. In college you had to go to class, and many of us already had bills back then too. The only real thing that changes is a possible lack of flexibility: if class conflicted with my plans I could skip it and catch up later; that option doesn't really exist when you go to work. Regardless, this is what I tell people: imagine the same fun life you already had, but this time you actually have money. You can still hang out with your friend's and crash your buddy's ATV into a ditch; the only difference is that when you go out for a beer after you can finally get that seasonal variation of Blue Moon instead of just a Bud Light.
Now, in the headline I mentioned that growing up sucks. Why is this? Well, it depends on your definition of growing up. If you're referring to the unavoidable process of aging and moving to new chapters in your life, it isn't always easy, but it doesn't have to suck. I, however, am referring to the same "growing up" that Carl Boenish is referring to in the quote above: the idea that you need to conform to an adult life that society expects of you. That point in life where suddenly it matters how you tie your tie (no joke; in college I had friends in the business/finance field say that this actually matters), where working long hours becomes brag-worthy, and everything from your sense of humor to what you do for fun is expected to flip a 180 and change entirely. Yes - that idea of growing up sucks. (By the way, look up who Carl Boenish is and read his story; his life is pretty inspiring)
However, the idea that success involves conforming to a narrow set of values and characteristics is pretty unsubstantiated. I've met plenty of people who make remarkable money having fun and living a good life. I know others who have awesome careers and they still are practically stress-free and nonchalant with life. I also like to think about a few weeks ago when I went to Kohl's looking for a new pair of skate shoes for work and I passed by the collared shirt/tie section thinking, "Man, that stuff just looks uncomfortable." I also highly recommend watching the documentary Riding Giants, or at least the first half-hour where they document the fun-loving surf lifestyle that directly contrasted with expected societal values.
Honestly, once you're at a point in life where you can grant yourself options and a degree of stability, is there a need to change anything else? If you have education, a job, and a good resume or whatnot, why would you ever need to give-up anything or change unwillingly just to "grow up" like society wants you to? Yes, responsibilities exist, and it's not always easy; I had to work hard to have the job I currently love, and I still have to pay my bills and do adult things. But you don't have to live some cut-and-paste life with a fancy job title just because you already went to school for it or because it will impress people. You don't need to dedicate your entire future to a busy job, buying a house and raising a family just because that's what society thinks success should be. Not enough people realize what adulthood truly is: it's freedom - the freedom to build it into what you truly want it to be.
