After living with acne for three years during college, it will come to no surprise to anyone that I'm tired of having it. Most days, I'm used to it. I'm used to the inflammation, the dry skin, the hyper-pigmentation and more. But other days, I look into the mirror and I wish I could just have normal, clear-looking skin without having to cake on five layers of foundation and concealer (which to be honest, sometimes makes the problem way worse).
As an adult with acne, I've been told numerous times to "just clean my face more" or "try out this product that worked for me" or "you should just exercise and eat better". Some have gone so far as to tell me that I wasn't done with puberty yet or that acne isn't "professional".
But news flash: adults can get acne too and most of us can't control it.
Before someone else tells me that I should try something else, let me run down the list of things I've tried and that have failed to help my acne:
Drugstore acne skincare products (I've spent hundreds of dollars on these and none of them worked), birth control, seeing a dermatologist (my face dried out from the harsh chemicals), taking antibiotics (these ruined my gut), taking hormone supplements (didn't help), cutting dairy out of my diet (has helped some, but is difficult to stick to), natural products and face oils (has helped, but doesn't get to the core issue), expensive skincare products (waste of money), and testing my hormones and blood levels (still hoping that these will help).
Over the years of trying to find a solution, I will say that I'm getting closer. My skin isn't as bad as before, but whenever someone makes a comment about my acne, it still hits home hard because they haven't seen how difficult this journey has been, or how far I've come. They don't see that I'm a clean person and I wash all my surfaces probably three times as often as most people do. They haven't seen the hundreds of dollars I've spent on trying to "cure" my acne, or the blow it's had to my self-esteem.
So before you comment on someone's acne, stop and think what it'd be like to be in their situation.
As someone with acne, I feel like I have to constantly justify myself and my actions. Unfortunately, we live in a society where clear skin is valued everywhere - from the professional workplace to all of our media and entertainment.
Learning to love my skin and be patient with it has been a long process that I still sometimes struggle with to this day. Over the course of many years, I have had to learn to accept my skin for what it is on any given day and remember that my skin does not define my beauty or my worth. I have to keep reminding myself that I have done the best I can to take care of my skin and that I am not alone in this battle.
It is my hope that people with acne can have more representation in media and in sharing their stories with others. Hearing the stories of people who have had acne for years makes me more confident in my own journey and has helped me remember that there are many strong and beautiful people out there that are going through the same thing.
Learning to love your skin is no easy journey - but no matter where you're at, know that you are not alone. In a society that values superficial beauty, we have to look beyond the things that are skin deep, especially when it comes to acne and many other skin-related topics.
Because in the end, our skin does not define us.
