"How was your summer?"

Quite terrible, actually. All of my new friends were miles away and I didn't really get to see them. But I got to see my old friends from home and spend time with my family, so I guess that's pretty cool.

"Are you happy to be back on campus?"

What would tell you that, my endless university apparel or my water bottle with our school's logo on it? Of course I'm glad to be back on campus and living with my friends again. Can you say FREEDOM?

"What are you looking forward to the most in this course?"

Well, completing it and getting the credits would be nice. I'll just tell you that I want a better understanding of the topic because that makes me seem less terrible. It'd be cool to learn some new vocabulary words too.

"What'd you do all summer?"

I worked, and then I slept. And then I worked again, and watched Netflix before I slept some more to get rest for work the next day. I'd say it was your average wild young adult's summer.

"Did you get a head start on reading your textbooks?"

Absolutely not, but I'll pretend that I did just to please you. I did Google the book once and the cover seemed cool. I'll check it out later if I decide to buy it.

"Tell me a fun fact about yourself."

Sometimes when I go to sleep, I don't wake up for 12 hours. I'd say that's some sort of special talent. I can also inhale a 20 piece McNugget.

"Why did you choose this university?"

Well, It's pretty cheap compared to my other options and I heard that the food was okay. It also has a great social environment and that's awesome too. The dorms are pretty sweet which is also a bonus, and I heard that my major's program was well known for success. Let's hope.

"What do you like to do in your free time?"

Oh, you know, eat, nap, watch Grey's Anatomy and cry a little, and occasionally study. I swear I'm just your average college student.

"Do you have any questions about the syllabus?"

Not really. Your eight page, front and back, full detail on every class day syllabus is in fact understandable. I do respect you for putting that much work in to make it clear.

"Is anyone offended by swear words?"

I was when I was 12. Now it actually makes me pay attention more and it makes me feel like you're one of the rare professors that treats their students like adults instead of kids. But if you swear AT me, that'll be a different story.