How many times have you read, or written yourself, an article or a post on social media that started with, “I have been noticing X, Y, and Z, and I just have to say that… [insert personal opinion about X, Y, and Z]?” What follows is usually an individual person’s emotional and fiery reaction to an event or trend, be it in politics or pop culture. While people are entitled to their opinions, these kinds of posts do one of two things: they either go completely unnoticed because no one wants to read someone’s rant on an already over-discussed topic, or they start large online debates in which no one is bettered. These statements are, at their core, reactionary, and are an indicator of the level of control other people have over your life. Before discussing how this shows other people’s control over your life, it is first necessary to define and explain what, exactly, reactionary statements are.

Reactionary statements are statements whose sole purpose is to respond. They can take on many forms, such as the example above, but at their core they are all the same—they all strive for nothing more than a response, a reaction to somebody else’s action. Consequently, reaction statements are a lower form of communication for they have no life of their own and can only ride on the backs of more important and more powerful communications. What reaction statements lack is a sense of authority that is given by originality of thought. In short, they fail to bring something new to the table. The friend that only repeats what others have said in a discussion as if it is his or her own opinion is not only the least respected member of the group, but also the first shushed and silenced. People do not want to hear what they have already heard when they are trying to move forward in a conversation.

Now, to some extent, all statements, and actions for that matter, are reactionary. When John F. Kennedy stated, “ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country,” he was reacting to the social and political situation of his day. It was the importance, eloquence, and timeliness of his statement that made it more than a reactionary one, and one with actual substance. It is those statements that serve as nothing more than an emotional vent for the one writing that qualify as a purely reactionary statements.

Having more fully explained what a reactionary statement is, it is now possible to show how it demonstrates the control other people have over your life. It does so in two ways: if you often make such statements and if you often are overly bothered by such statements. If you often make truly reactionary statements, you are, in effect, being tossed about by the rhetoric of others and are unable to add anything new to the conversation because you are too busy digesting and regurgitating what others have already said. A similar thing can be said about the one who is often very bothered by the reactionary statements of others. If someone’s reaction statement, an unthoughtful and unoriginal idea, gets a reaction out of you, it is safe to say that you have not properly processed that idea in the first place. When you originate or participate in reaction statements, others are controlling your thoughts and actions. If you are consumed enough by the conversation to actually open your mouth and speak, but what you say is just a “feelings update” about the situation, you have merely reacted to another person’s original idea, and failed to contribute anything of your own. In short, reaction statements reveal whether or not you have things of your own to say.

Finally, I would like to suggest a way to refrain from reaction statements and to stop other people from controlling your mind: act and do not react. Be a conversation starter, not a latecomer who must put his or her oar in the water, whether or not he or she is prepared. If you are not informed on a subject and it concerns you, discuss it with your friends and mentors first, then speak out about it, if you deem it worthy of your time and words. In one sense, I am challenging you to be more protective with your time. Value yourself and your thoughts more by refraining from conversation that is not important or worthy of your time. Speak and act only when you have something to say, not when others are bantering about inconsequential topics. All this can be boiled down to one simple mantra: action over reaction.