I could really sit here and just ramble on for hours about how much of a roller coaster this year has been for me, because boy was it, and boy did I suffer. Aside from being one of, if not the most emotionally difficult years of my life, it was one of the most stressful, defeating, trying years too. With being a full time student, working, dealing with a break up, personal issues, and just the pressures of the future I was in a really unhappy place. It got to the point that I worried my loved ones, which for me was the hardest of all.

I won’t sit here and sugarcoat the godawful attitude I had towards everything for the majority of the year, nor will I try to justify it. I was such a pain and so negative, and lost sight of so much. Despite the attitude and failure to see the good, I always knew how lucky I was I guess but I just needed to be reminded. And that’s what this is about.

I’m actually really embarrassed and ashamed to say that I spent a good amount of time sulking in the worst, because I’m blessed beyond measure. And in a lot of ways, I really hate that it took breaking down over something so ridiculous for me to acknowledge what I do have, but in so many more ways, I’m grateful something so small was able to finally slap some sense into me.

Onto some details about why today is known as one of my favorite days..

A couple months back I woke up extremely late for school, threw on random clothes, brushed my teeth, rushed out the door, quickly reversed out of my driveway and headed towards school. Traffic, so much traffic. Not only that, I desperately needed to get gas. Rolling my eyes and already annoyed, I worked my way over to the nearest gas station which wasn’t remotely close to school or home, then I realized I didn’t have my wallet. I started driving back to my house and I kid you not, my tire blew and I ended up in the middle of nowhere. Guess who was late? Me. Guess who had no wallet, no jack to change the tire, and was in the worst mood? Me, me, and me again. As I sat in my car and waited for a mechanic to come help me out, I thought to myself every negative thought I could come up with: my car sucks, my life sucks, I have the worst luck, this would happen, I can’t believe it, etc. Then I looked up and saw a handicapped man pass in front of my car with a basketball in one hand, while he wheeled with the other one, and he smiled at me. This brings me back to being really embarrassed and ashamed of the way I acted for so long. I sat there and recollected myself of all the things I had lost sight of throughout the course of a year; my appreciation, my awareness, my ability to see the good in the bad.

Today, and every day since then, I wake up and count my blessings. I’m aware, I’m thankful, I’m grateful, and I’m appreciative. My life has remarkably improved since then. I realized it isn’t the load that breaks you down, it’s the way you carry it. The challenges and hardships of life are inevitable, and they either make you or break you. It’s all about your mentality towards them. It’s about taking time to acknowledge the good through the bad. It’s about getting a flat tire and reminding yourself that it can be changed, it’s about being appreciative you have a car and the ability to drive one in the first place. It’s waking up and appreciating that you did when someone somewhere didn’t have that luck, it’s going to school happy because you have your education when others only get to dream of having that same opportunity. It’s recognizing that even on your worst days, you have someone reassuring you and encouraging you that it’ll all be okay.

I have found that having this mentality is all the difference between happiness and unhappiness. If you choose to have this mentality, you’ll see that a good day isn’t the difference between good things happening and bad things happening, it’ll be acknowledging that the day simply happening was what made it good. Waking up, having the ability to share your experience of that day with someone at the end of it will be enough. You’ll come to realize that you don’t need a perfect life to be appreciate of it, you don’t need a perfect life to be happy.

This is something I encourage anyone reading to try. Wake up and find appreciation in your day, always remain conscious that regardless of what happens during it, you’re at least alive to live it. Of course there are days that are difficult and trying, but even then, they help you better appreciate the good ones and remind you that you are strong enough to see better ones too.

In conclusion, my little experience that day did the most for me, I certainly never thought I’d find so much appreciation in a flat tire and losing 2% of my grade in Spanish that day, but that’s exactly what happened. I’ve always had so much to be grateful for and needed a nudge to remember just that. So lastly, if any of my loved ones are reading this, I am SO thankful for all of your love, encouragement, and support that I, for the most part, failed to recognize a good amount of the time. I recognize it today, and I value it more than anything. Any growth, any happiness, anything positive in my life is due to what you sent my way. Thank you for being what I appreciate daily.