Forgive and forget.
We are taught this simple, three-word phrase, from a young age and learn that we ought to strive to live our lives with forgiveness, and thereafter, resilience. Resilience to people and things that have hurt our hearts, whether it be intentional or unintentional.
I am almost 20 years old and my heart has been hurt quite a few times, intentionally and unintentionally. If there is one thing I have learned from all the hurt my heart has endured, it's that you should always forgive, but to forget is to undermine what you truly deserve. To forget is to allow those that have hurt you to continue to do so time and time again. To forget is never to take the hurt in your heart and mold it into knowledge in which could guide your heart towards greater things.
Forgiveness, however, is a different story.
Forgiveness is imperative in building strong, efficient, beautiful relationships with others, but also with yourself.
Forgiveness will set you free.
I have never felt forgiveness to be such an important aspect of my life until recently, when I made the decision to forgive someone who hurt my heart in varying ways, shapes and forms. Whether the hurt was purposeful or accidental, I made the conscious decision to let go of all the things my heart was so uselessly holding onto and to forgive.
I made the conscious decision to forgive this person for differing reasons. For starters, to reinvent our old, amazing friendship. To no longer harbor any bitter feelings for this person. To find a middle ground where we could let go of the past and appreciate each other, in the way we once so wonderfully did, again. But above all of the reasons I decided to forgive this person, I did it for myself. For my happiness. To clear my heart.
I made the conscious decision to forgive because I wanted to clear my heart. Of bitter feelings. Of hate. Of the past. Of anything that was not improving who I am as a person.
Forgiving the people who have hurt my heart has helped me to see the good in goodbye. It has helped me to no longer feel angry. To appreciate what hurt has taught me and learn from my own and other's mistakes. But most of all, forgiveness has taught me to not become the person who has hurt me.
If you want to have a strong, independent, open-hearted relationship with yourself, it is imperative to forgive. Forgive the people who have hurt you, and only then can your heart be cleared of bitter feelings and opened to love. Love for yourself and for those you wish to have wonderful, colorful, beautiful friendships and relationships with. Forgive yourself for things you believe you have done wrong. Like I said, though, never forget. Forgetting would mean your mistakes have lead you nowhere, and that you are too proud to admit you have been in the wrong. But forgiving means you recognized and taken your mistakes into your hands, only to mold them into bits and pieces of the person that you strive to be.
Forgiveness is an act of courage. Be bold and be brave.
