Absinthe Laced Coffee | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Entertainment

Absinthe Laced Coffee

A short story that would have you thinking that maybe you drank absinthe

66
Absinthe Laced Coffee
images5.fanpop
A twist, a turn, and maybe something else

Sometimes I have no ideas on Thursday when I start writing an article. And well here is my no idea Thursday for this week. Hopefully I don't have to do this again.

"So what will happen to me?" I say uneasily as I start to watch the principal circle in on me.

"What do you mean you?" The principal coos smiling like a hyena. "I'm not after you I'm after someone else I just need her to get out of you.

He is mental I try to think but another part of me is thinking, what does he mean her I am not a her. I have never been a her. I have always been me. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh I think you know! Don't you realize why you black out and don't remember some days. Well do you?"

"I have never blacked out what are you talking about?" But then I remember that I have blacked out before. I don't even know what day this is even what year. I've been time traveling a lot and I remember all of my past lives and sometimes get them confused. But right now I am a 17 year old card soldier, yes like those in Alice and Wonderland, so there is no way that I can be her.

"Maybe I got it wrong!" The principal says dejected

"So I can go!" I happily exclaim

"No you are not going anywhere!" The principal laughs as he turns into a giant snake. "Now get ready to die!" He hisses.

"But I don't want to die." I cry as I get into a defensive motion.

"I doesn't matter you will!" he hisses as he lunges at me and I can feel a tongue on my face. And as I open my eyes I see that it is his forked tongue and he is coiled around me.

As my life is drained I scream and cry but at the last second I smell dog. I wonder why dog that was until I open my eyes and see my dog Louie's tongue licking my face and feel my blankets wrapped around me very tight. Well I guess that's that, I think, it was only a dream. I exhale but apparently the exhale awakes me even more and throws me through a loop.

In this loop I don't have a dog and I don't have a bed and I don't have a body. Seeing that I don't have a body let's me relax because I am air and air is everywhere but doesn't have a body.

But as I blow I wake up and realize that I am a pug which is weird because why a pug. And then I realize that I have to pee which causes me to turn into a cat. So I scoot off to the litter box but before I can even get one paw inside. I change again.

This time I am night. I have a full moon and am speckled with stars.

But as a shooting star passes the moon I change again. This time I wake up in a cold sweat back in my bed back to me and as I look to my bedside table I find the suspect of what caused this crazy night. He is right next to my coffee laced with absinthe. He is no bigger than a penny. In fact, he is on a penny. No it is not Abe Lincoln. He is the alligator that is on the back of the Abe Lincoln coin that I found that is worth $10. And no it is not a very old rare coin. It is a modern coin and it is very common but maybe what is less common is that I can hear the alligator singing. And then I look back at the absinthe laced coffee which I didn’t drink any of.

Suddenly I get dizzy and I black out. When I wake up I look down and see that I am wearing a floral sundress that’s when I have to realize that I am her. So here it is sometimes I am Marty a butch gay and sometimes I am her Francesca a lipstick lesbian and realize that maybe I am flawed but hey isn’t everybody.


Congratulations you have finished the story. Do you feel like you drank absinthe since it was crazy. Well I can say for certain that at least one of us didn't drink absinthe but which one?


I mean no offense to anybody who has a condition like this or to anybody who is LGBT. I just didn't have a story and I thought that it would be fun for me to try to write a story by going off on so many tangents. Also I was completely sober while writing this.




Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Blair Waldorf Quote
"DESTINY IS FOR LOSERS. IT'S JUST A STUPID EXCUSE TO WAIT FOR THINGS TO HAPPEN INSTEAD OF MAKING THEM HAPPEN." - BLAIR WALDORF.

The world stopped in 2012 when our beloved show "Gossip Girl" ended. For six straight years, we would all tune in every Monday at 9:00 p.m. to see Upper Eastside royalty in the form of a Burberry headband clad Blair Waldorf. Blair was the big sister that we all loved to hate. How could we ever forget the epic showdowns between her and her frenemy Serena Van Der Woodsen? Or the time she banished Georgina Sparks to a Christian summer camp? How about that time when she and her girls took down Bart Bass? Blair is life. She's taught us how to dress, how to be ambitious, and most importantly, how to throw the perfect shade.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

11 Moments Every College Freshman Has Experienced

Because we made it, and because high school seniors deserve to know what they're getting themselves into

61
too tired to care

We've all been there. From move-in day to the first finals week in college, your first term is an adventure from start to finish. In honor of college decisions coming out recently, I want to recap some of the most common experiences college freshmen experience.

1. The awkward hellos on move-in day.

You're moving your stuff onto your floor, and you will encounter people you don't know yet in the hallway. They live on your floor, so you'll awkwardly smile and maybe introduce yourself. As you walk away, you will wonder if they will ever speak to you again, but don't worry, there's a good chance that you will make some great friends on your floor!

Keep Reading...Show less
laptop
Unsplash

The college years are a time for personal growth and success. Everyone comes in with expectations about how their life is supposed to turn out and envision the future. We all freak out when things don't go exactly as planned or when our expectations are unmet. As time goes on, we realize that the uncertainty of college is what makes it great. Here are some helpful reminders about life in college.

Keep Reading...Show less
students
rowanuniversitypublications / Flickr

1. "If I'm wearing black tomorrow, it's because I'm mourning my grade."

2. "Do you want to try ordering Chinese takeout to take back to the stacks?"

3. "This final paper has me questioning if this professor just sucks or is Satan himself."

4. "Is that person over there OK? They've been sleeping for a while."

5. "Why are you online shopping?"

"I want to motivate myself to study."

"Since when do you have money to buy something anyway?"

6. "I wonder how much I could make as a stripper."

7. "There are no stress relief dogs, and I feel conned. My stress today is worse than yesterday."

8. "Rate My Professor screwed me over."

9. "I wore these clothes yesterday, and maybe even the day before, but it's fine."

10. "I wonder if I could sneak a beer in here."

11. "I just really want chocolate chip cookies."

students
Sophia Palmerine

Dear High School Friend Group,

My sweet angels, where would I be without you guys. We all grew up together because we either met in middle school or high school and watched each other grow up and get "old." We got to go to prom together and then graduate together. Then watched each other as we continued our lives in college, joining sororities and meeting people who will impact our lives forever. It all has happened so fast.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments