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Relationships

A Word on Long Distance Relationships

The good, the bad, and the ugly.

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A Word on Long Distance Relationships
https://www.google.com/maps/dir/La+Crosse,+Wisconsin/Poughkeepsie,+New+York/@41.5313367,-91.5019562,5z/data=!3m1!4b1!4m14!4m13!1m5!1m1!1s0x87f954df6732b395:0x7fa98815193722b0!2m2!1d-91.2519017!2d43.8137751!1m5!1m1!1s0x89dd3e642be0bb3b:0x5ea85debfb20f349!2m2!1d-73.9209701!2d41.7003713!3e0

The idea of a long-distance relationship always turned me off. As a pubescent, hormone-struck teenager, I remember watching my older cousin attempt to date a boy that lived on the west coast and thinking that I would never in a million years put myself in the position of being in a long-distance relationship. After all, a girl has her needs, and certain needs can't be met with a cross country relationship. I was firm in my belief that in order for a relationship to thrive, you must be in close proximity to your significant other.

Well, young adult, college-girl Ali went and got herself in a relationship with the sweetest, kindest, most handsome boy she'd ever come across in all her 22 years. For the first two years of the relationship, her and her boyfriend were together at least 75% of the time. They shared most meals together, slept together each night, and basically lived in each other's apartments. They'd go to the library together to do schoolwork, and at each and every social event, they were attached at the hip. They were incomplete without the other Now, you can imagine the imminent shock and deep sadness they felt when their omnipresent togetherness was no longer possible.

The thing with your 20's is that life seems to be pulling you from every different direction. They are your most self-defining years; the years that you truly find yourself and determine who you're going to be in this life. That being said, when I was welcomed into the graduate program I had only been accepted to in my dreams, I seized the opportunity, somberly knowing that this indicated the promise of two and a half long years of long-distance dating.

I am going to put it simply and honestly: long-distance dating sucks. I miss my boyfriend each and every day. I wake up every morning wishing he was there next to me, and I go to sleep every night with a heavy heart, knowing I just lived another day without his comforting and blissful physical presence in my life. It is certainly a challenge, but one that I know will be absolutely worth it in the end.

One aspect that makes long-distance dating worthwhile is that each time we get to spend time together, it's an adventure. It's a treat, a high amongst the lull of everyday life. I truly believe that we hug tighter, kiss harder, and love bigger than we ever did when we were together every day. I treasure and cherish our moments, and tuck them away in my memory bank to reflect on on the toughest of days, the days I miss him most, the days I'm driven to tears. The loneliness is real sometimes.

I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason; everything in life plays out for a purpose. I am grateful that my boyfriend and I have the opportunities to grow on our own for a while, in separate environments. I know that although it is tough, we will come out on the other side stronger than ever as individuals and as a pair.

Call me a hopeless romantic, but I believe in the type of love that endures all obstacles, the type of love that rises above all challenges. Long-distance is hard, but the love I have for this man is stronger than anything I have ever felt, and because of that, I am confident that together we will overcome this challenge and come out on the other side stronger than ever. He is my best friend, my soulmate, and my confidante, even from over a thousand miles a way. Despite the loneliness and heartache I feel from time to time, our daily FaceTime calls, monthly visits, and all the little things in between make the distance so worth it.

Here's to love, no matter what span of miles physically separates it.

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