There are so many things I wish I could go back and change. So many words I wish I wouldn't have left unspoken. By the time I was 17 I had already faced so many crazy obstacles, but now I wish I could go back and help myself through them. If I could, this is what I'd say.
1. Love on your family as much as possible.
Time slips away too fast.
Of course, just like anyone else, I witnessed death quite a bit throughout my life. I had been to funerals of kids younger than me and people way older than me. I would remind myself that I would be leaving in just a few months to go to college, and I would not see them as much. Anything can happen in just a split second, and you don't want to regret anything, so get over yourself, and love on them.
2. Don't quit the job you love, for the boy.
I was making good money, but I felt like the job was coming in between the relationship that was going to last forever. Listen to me, IT DOES NOT LAST.
3. Don't let the girls get to you, it's your senior year. Enjoy it!
I had this thing in high school, where I liked to let people under my skin, way too much. I would let it bother me until I couldn't sleep. Enjoy every single second of your senior cheer season, for it goes to soon. Push through the drama, the pain, and the stress. You will miss it.
4. Do you boo boo!
Literally means what it says. For too long I focused on making everyone else happy, not myself. Especially through my senior year, I told people what they wanted to hear, and was too nice.
5. Go to prom with your friends!
Now, school dances are what you make them. Prom is supposed to be this night where you spend tons of money, to look "beautiful" and dance all night long. If I could change anything about my senior year, I would have went to prom with my friends. Now don't get me wrong, I had a good time. But, I could've went without crying in the bathroom at all four of my proms.
6. Have fun on your senior trip!
Wow, my senior trip was a lot better than I expected, but once again I let someone get in the way of my happiness. Therefore, I didn't do all the things on my senior trip I wish I would have.
7. Stop looking for love in the wrong places.
Being manipulated is not love. You'll truly know what it feels to have someone love you once you hit college, and go through another nasty break up. But things will be okay. Don't force yourself to stay somewhere you're not happy, and do things you don't want to do. That's not love. I know your perception of love is fuzzy, because you've never seen what it truly is, but you will. But this, this is not love. Get out!
8. Smile
I know you hate it, because trust me, 19 year old you does too. But a smile is worth it. People in college will tell you everyday how beautiful it is, and they will tell you how much you've changed their lives in the few short months you've known each other. Now, smile, it's beautiful and you are too.
9. Love yourself
I know this is even harder than a smile, hell you faked a smile for the last how many years? But, truly learn to love yourself before you try to love anyone else. I promise it will be worth it.
