So you've got a big butt and you cannot lie. It's a struggle, I know. I have been extremely blessed in the lower half of my body. I wear a size 17 in pants, but I'm a medium in shirts. You see the dilemma. There are so many struggles that come with this beautiful gift known as having a big butt, but you can't seem to get away from the fact that you look like "one of those rap stars' girlfriends." If you or anyone you know is struggling with some booty issues, then this right here is for you.
1. Finding pants
You can never find the right pair of pants because either they cannot go all the way up your thighs, or when you do find the right pair of pants they fit everywhere but the waist. So you have to punch extra holes in your belt just so they can stay up, and your underwear doesn't have to make an appearance today even though with your big booty it is.
2. See-through leggings
I honestly don't even bother buying leggings, because no matter what my huge butt makes them see through. And the really good leggings that aren't see-through even with the addition of the booty cost way too much money to only spend on one pair of leggings.
3. Creepers
Thanks to the round thing on their timelines, dudes are automatically sprung. Literally they are hooked and can't stop staring. Like their comments are so outlandish and creepy that you are just so confused that normal people would even say that to someone. But then you realize that if you weren't blessed with the booty then you would have to endure the creepy DM's and comments under your Instagram pictures.
4. Walking up the stairs in front of people
The problem with this is that you can't walk in front of them going up the stairs because you know that round thing is gonna be in their face, and not everyone is cool with that. Not only that, but the booty sometimes jiggles alot and this can be uncomfortable for not just the person behind you, but for you yourself. Too much junk in the trunk. Sometimes if you are with you friends they love to increase your awkwardness with a nice smack.
5. Buying bathing suits
If you go to the store and they don't have mix and match tops and bottoms, you are pretty much walking out. I wasn't really blessed upstairs, so when I buy a bikini top I'm getting a medium, but I have to buy XL, sometimes XXL bottoms, and honestly I get so mad when I see that you can't mix and match bathing suits. Why you do this to me?
6. Short skirts = NO
Don't even think about it unless you want to flash your goodies to everyone. Short skirts may look good in the front, but in the back you are giving everyone a free strip tease. No Bueno. If it's not a maxi skirt, you are kind of out of luck in the skirt department.
7. Random rips in pants
I honestly cannot tell you how many times a pair of pants have ripped in the butt of my jeans. Or they started ripping in the thigh area. Looking back to struggle number one, it took you forever just to find those great pair of jeans and took less time to rip them thanks to my hump.
8. Your booty comes up in regular conversation
"Oh, Stacey, I wasn't sure if it was you, but then I saw the booty and I knew it was." Common phrase of my daily life -- people recognize you due to the booty. References to large objects are typically compared to your booty. Why? Because it is just there.
9. You are regularly used as a pillow
If I had a dollar for every time someone used my butt as a pillow, I would be rich.
