My life sometimes feels like a series of unfortunate events. One of the most common recurring tragedies in my life is the destruction of my phones. It seems almost impossible for me to have a phone for longer than about six months before there is some sort of issue. So, as I am going through the loss of yet another phone, here are the phases of emotion I have been dealing with and have dealt with in the past.
1. What just happened?
This is the very first phase of breaking your phone. You notice its getting a little weird or there are small glitches, or, worst case scenario, it won’t turn on at all. In your head you recreate every move you’ve made and wonder where you could’ve went wrong.
2. The sense of hope
Maybe you did mess up your phone a little, but it still might be able to be fixed, right? Maybe if you just try turning it back on and off or stick it in that bag of rice for a while it’ll have no choice but to work. A nice reboot and some rice can fix anything. You couldn’t have actually broken it.
3. Nope, it’s a goner
You’ve tried everything yet have probably not left the phone alone long enough for any of your methods to effectively work anyway. Your phone is broken.
4. What could I have done differently?
This is where you just begin reevaluating your whole life and come down on yourself hard. You start wondering how you could have ever let this happen. You realize you probably should have listened to your friends and Yahoo Answers and just left it alone for a few hours.
5. Sudden emptiness
I know, I know, this sounds super extreme, but there is just something about not being in such instant contact with your friends or family that makes you feel a little helpless. No social media or texting makes you feel so disconnected even if your phone only broke three hours ago. That’s a long time when you’re used to everything instantly at your fingertips.
6. A call to action
You’re done throwing yourself a one person pity party and now it’s time to get down to business. You can’t be a hermit and live without your smartphone forever. So, you check your insurance and warranty and call your provider and try and get the ball rolling.
7. Anticipation
Now you just can’t wait to get your replacement phone. You feel like it’s been so long since you’ve been in contact with the world when in reality it’s probably only been about two days at this point. The wait is making you anxious.
8. Contentment
By now, you’ve actually gotten kind of used to not being in constant contact with everyone and everything. You actually can survive without a smartphone. Who would’ve thought?! Maybe you don’t actually need a phone.
9. IT’S HERE
Your replacement phone is finally here and all those thoughts about not needing a phone go right out the window. You’ve suddenly never felt more complete and overjoyed and everything in life is pretty good again.
Breaking your phone is an emotional rollercoaster full of self-pity and attempts to comfort yourself from your shattered first-world life. Living without a phone for a week can be tough, but just always remember how lucky we are for these luxuries that come in and out of our lives so easily that we often take for granted.
