For many people Athens is a romantic place, a place where they may have formed their first real romantic relationship, found true love, or a place where they at least made out with someone in public only to find their five-minute fling retweeted on Bobcat Makeouts.
For those of you in maddening, fireworks-red roses-and-diamond-rings-style love, you may consider making the next step in your relationship toward the long haul, attempting a commitment even more dedicated than simply allowing your significant other to use some of your hard-earned and precious flex points at West 82. You may be hearing wedding bells.
A lot of lifelong couples meet on our beautiful campus, and for those Bobcats in love, Athens may be the perfect spot for an over-the-top and cheesy proposal. There are, however, some places where a proposal may be unwelcome ...
1. Chubb Hall
Chubb is the perfect place for anxiously waiting in a long, intimidating line and inquiring about financial worries or hopefully getting green-slipped into a full class as well as sweating profusely because the temperature always seems to be somewhere between nervous dewiness and the angry raging fires of the underworld. Chubb isn’t exactly a comforting place to relax, let alone begin a new romantic chapter.
2. South Beach
I have a feeling you don’t want your special moment interrupted by getting hit in the head with a Frisbee or having an asthma attack from the wafting smokes of hookah from a nearby picnic table.
3. The Elevator in Glidden
The main purpose of this elevator is to avoid going up stairs, so be prepared for a lot of uncomfortable encounters with bystanders and constantly asking someone if they want to be deposited on the fourth floor. Bended knee is also not the ideal position for the constant up-and-down of the aged elevator. The only time anyone made an elevator seem cool was when Beyoncé coyfully rapped about it in the "Flawless" remix featuring Nicki Minaj, and I think you and I both know it would be blasphemous to compare ourselves to Beyoncé.
4. Dirty South
Do you really want to tell people the pinnacle of your love was expressed at place that is affectionately described as dirty?
5. Copeland
If you tried to videotape your proposal you would barely be able to hear yourself over the sound of all of the business majors complaining about how hard THE CLUSTER is.
“You know I love you because you ...”
“THIS GROUP PROJECT ISN’T GOING TO DO ITSELF”
“ ... and I don’t think I could live wi— ...”
“IS THIS BUSINESS SUIT FORMAL ENOUGH?”
“... will you marry m— ...”
“I AM GOING ON ONE HOUR OF SLEEP ... ONE HOUR!”
6. Hudson Health Center
This is an almost 100 percent guarantee to not only catch a cold, but also to wait for hours surrounded by miserable people awaiting their turn to see a doctor. Your proposal certainly would not garner any heartfelt ovations or congratulations other than the person next to you asking for a Kleenex and a nurse attempting to explain to a freshman how to fill out the paperwork.
7. The top of Morton Hill
Good luck attempting to express your heartfelt sentiments as you struggle to breathe and debate whether the pain in your calves warrants a trip to aforementioned Hudson.
8. Bentley Hall
Not only does the temperature never seem to be well-regulated for the current season, but between classes, it’s about as easy to navigate as a crowded subway platform. You’re barely able to stand up straight and move, let alone get down on one knee, present a ring and have a touching moment.
9. The Tech Depot
You didn’t return your clicker from freshman year and now is not the time to dwell on past mistakes.
For more pictures of places on campus like these check out the Ohio University Campus Map online or this blog post also featuring some great pictures of other campus landmarks.
