I'm going to be honest - when I first started college, majoring in English was not my plan. I was going to major in political science and head to law school. That had been the plan for most of my life, and for the first two semesters in college, it seemed like that was going to continue to be the plan.
However, one day, when I realized that my dream of majoring in political science was going to require me to leave my commuter college and transfer, I decided that perhaps I should start looking into other majors. Because of this, I stumbled upon English, and quite frankly, it was the best decision I've ever made.
However, after 3 years of telling people, "Oh! I'm majoring in English." I've come to realize that there are some things people think about English majors, and quite frankly, I'm getting tired of hearing these specific ones every time someone asks me what I'm majoring in.
1. Oh, so you want to teach?
Now, I have all of the respect in the world for education majors. Really, I do. However, teaching is not something I plan on doing with my life anytime soon. Please stop asking me.
2. So then, what do you want to do?
Oh, I don't know. Here's a list of 75 things I can do with my degree because it's amazingly versatile and being able to communicate and write effectively is valued at every job ever.
3. You must spend all your time reading.
You know, surprisingly, I do. Since you major in math, I'm going to take a safe bet and say you must spend a good portion of your time doing math problems. Funny how majors work out that way.
4. It must be nice to have a light course load.
Read seven 18th century novels and then analyze them through eight different critical lenses and get back to me on how "easy" my major is.
5. I wish I could just read and write all the time. Instead, I have all these problems to try and figure out.
Presumably, your problems have a right answer. My essay has no right answer. My answer is only right if I can prove it's right (and even then its not always right) and that takes more time than you can imagine.
6. Could you edit my *insert thing that needs to be edited here.*
Are you going to pay me? Because unless you're saying yes, the answer is no.
7. I could never major in that. Reading is boring.
Allow me to introduce you to any 400 level English class. Spend 15 minutes listening to the conversations that go on in that class, and then tell me reading is boring.
8. Okay, but you live in America. Don't you know how to speak English?
Contrary to popular belief, none of my teachers have actually sat me down and taught me how to speak the language. Shocking I know, but it's not the same as Spanish or French.
9. What do you learn?
Again, sit in a 400 level English class for 15 minutes. The better question is what DON'T I learn.
10. So what's the point of poetry?
You know, just because I major in a subject does not mean I enjoy every section of that subject. It's been three years and I still think poetry is ridiculous. That's never going to change.
11. You should have no problems with the readings for this general education class. Don't you enjoy reading?
Yes, I do enjoy reading. I do not, however, enjoy science. Surprisingly enough, this is a science class I am currently in. I'm not going to enjoy doing the reading for it.
12. Have you read *insert classic novel here*
No, I haven't. Believe it or not, there are other novels in this world, and my professors are more interested in them than they are with the ramblings of some dead white guy.
13. Oh my god! You made a grammatical error?
Am I to believe you've literally never made a mistake in your intended major? Is that what you're telling me right now?
