It's the most (abnormally crazed) time of the year: Shark Week. While I was never one of the thousands to park myself in front of the TV and obsess over it, I've recently gained a newfound appreciation for it through one realization of mine: an annual segment about sharks is completely applicable to my love life.
1. People only care about it once a year.
These occasions include but are not limited to: the middle of summer, Valentine's Day and every. single. holiday you spend with your extended family.
2. Some people are invested in it way more than others.
I'm looking at you, Mom. Please stop asking me if I've found a boyfriend yet. (But keep your friends' Facebook comments of "she's a very beautiful young woman" and "I'm sure all the boys are chasing her!" coming.)
3. The amount of action it gets is enough to fit in just one week.
Even then, it's a stretch. People end up getting bored with the repeated reruns and lack of excitement by the end.
4. The "Jaws" theme song plays whenever it's time to go in for the kill.
There's nothing like the imaginary "Dun Dun"s to match your racing heartbeat and crippling anxiety as you try to make a move!
5. What does a shark's prey and my relationships have in common? They never last.
6. People often react frightened when they hear news.
"Did you hear there was a Great White spotted off the coast of the Cape?" "Did you hear Amanda actually socialized with a boy last night?"
7. One is cold-blooded. One is cold-hearted.
Google dictionary defines cold-heartedness as "lacking affection or warmth." Close enough to being cold-blooded, right?
