75 Of The Most Legendary One-Liners From 'Jersey Shore' | The Odyssey Online
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75 Of The Most Legendary One-Liners From 'Jersey Shore'

Get crazy, get wild. Let's party, get loud.

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75 Of The Most Legendary One-Liners From 'Jersey Shore'
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Whether you like to admit it or not— you and I both know that MTV's "Jersey Shore" was nothing short of iconic.

If you're a true Jersey native like myself, it's safe to say that people would ask you if the beaches in the Garden State were like the show over and over and over again. This show was jam packed with psychotic, intoxicated, hysterical, brain cell-killing, and straight up mind-blowing moments brought to you by the most randomly put together, interesting cast.

From the duck phone, to Sammi Sweetheart crying— to Mike "The Situation" being this millennium's ultimate creep to Vinny's mom, and all the constant drama— we loved to love this show more than we loved to hate this show. Why, you might ask? Because there was an endless stream of infamous moments which easily marked its territory in today's pop culture.

Here are 75 of the most legendary one-liners brought to you by your friends from "Jersey Shore" on MTV:

1. "My only rule: Never fall in love at the Jersey Shore."


2. "Stop it! Staaaaaaaaahp!"


3. "If that b*tch still plays laser tag, she's too young for you, bro."

4. "Face down ass up, that's the way I like to have a good time."


5. "I'm still pretty, b*tch."


6. "Lose f*cking five or 10 pounds and we can talk."


7. "You don't even look Italian."


8. "You are the worst argument person ever."


9. "JWoww and her boobies are going to Italy."


10. "I am the pimp daddy Mac on this whole place."


11. "Rahn, stap."


12. "She starts charging at me like a f*cking hippo."


13. "I look like a piece of sausage next to these meatballs. I'm gonna stand in the middle so it looks like a big d*ck."


14. "Listen, I'm a good f*ck."


15. "Whore-bags."


16. "STALKER!"


17. "You shouldn't have to change for any man — you find a man who will accept you."


18. "Is there a moon in this country?"


19. "The toilet is clogged because I live with farm animals."


20. "He has a girlfriend? Really? He kissed my p*ssy last night so..."


21. "It's T-shirt timeeeeeeeeeeeee."


22. "Funny how people become p*ssies all of the sudden."


23. "I never thought somebody would make Snooki look like a rocket scientist but Deena takes the cake."


24. "You better send roses to the house, you feel me? Roses, dawg. With pickles in them — fried pickles!"


25. "Keep on drinking."


26. "You like the boobs?????"


27. "Vinny is my dude. We're like the meatballs except we're not the meatballs."


28. "Shut the f*ck up because who are you?"

29. "I need a f*cking hot guy right now."


30. "1,2,3,4— I declare a prank war."

31. "I have a feeling whorebag will be here next."


32. "Maybe my tit fat got a little smaller but these f*ckers are like 700 CC's and they're gonna stay 700 CC's."


33. "People should go to school at a bar."


34. "Yo, shut your mouth, you dirty little hamster."

35. "I'll f*cking pound you, b*tch."


36. "If Deena's boobies could talk they'd say, 'I'm a good time, I'm a blast in a bra!'"


37. "I'm tanorexic, bro."


38. "I can lose weight for free. You need about 10 grand to fix your f*cking face."


39. "Where's the beach?"


40. "I'm a f*cking good person!!!!"


41. "Um, hello?????"


42. "This woman is not a grenade, this woman is an atomic bomb."


43. "SlopTart + Hippopotamus = Slopoptamus."


44. "It's like guido bingo."


45. "One shot, bro. That's all it took. One shot."


46. "Watch me cause I'm going to f*ckin' sh*t on you harder than you ever sh*t on me."

47. "When my kids asked me, 'Where have you worked?'... I'd say 'b*tch, I've made pizza in Florence.'"


48. "Like, you need a golden ticket to get into these drawers."


49. "As my stomach feels like it's gonna explode, I don't stop eating. It makes me realize what a gluttonous piece of sh*t I am."

50. "Party's here."

51. "You should know about trashy, baby. You're from Staten Island!"


52. "You don't yank my newly weave that I just got."


53. "Yeahhhhhh, buddy."


54. "I'm surrounded by couples every day, it's so annoying."

55. "Say NO to hoes."


56. "I'm out of gel... Justin Bieber eat your heart out."


57. "I don't have time for stupid bimbos."

58. "I'm like a hamster in heat."


59. "Things don't always end the way a fairytale ends."

60. "Let's do it!!!!"


61. "Dude, you're going to get all the girls!"


62. "Team cuca!"

63. "You call me burnt toast, oompa loompa, orange freak — as long as I know that I'm tan, call me whatever you want."

64. "You traumatized me. Do you understand that?"


65. "If you look up 'too much swag' in the dictionary there'll be a great, big picture of my face."

66. "I had to move the table because was getting real serious. I didn't want anything to happen to the table, you know what I'm saying?"


67. "You can stay and get your ass beat or you can stay and get your f*cking ass beat."

68. "STD — stop the drama."


69. "Let's just get wasteypants."


70. "Whatever, I forgot to put my underwears on."

71. "BUSTED!"


72. "Pretty serious situation right now..."

73. "I definitely don't deserve to be talked to the way you're talking to me right now."

74. "Step out of it! F*cking hit me."


75. "HELP."


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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