7 Uses For Your Degree, Besides Getting A Job | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Student Life

7 Uses For Your Degree, Besides Getting A Job

Because, let's be honest, Uncle Jim won't stop talking about the economy nowadays.

19
7 Uses For Your Degree, Besides Getting A Job
Excite

We've all heard about the current economic climate. We all know, as current college students, that no matter what career field you pick, baby boomers are retiring older, and you need 3 years unpaid experience to get an entry level job in your career field of choice.

So, what do you do now with that fancy piece of paper that you went into debt for life for? Well, my good friend, that's where we can help

1. Take it Out on a Fancy Date

Since you're so busy job searching that you don't have time for a significant other, nor time to find one, when the loneliness creeps ever closer, you can always take your Diploma out to your "this is my last $500" fancy dinner date! The best part is, your degree won't eat much, since it's paper and is reflective of all of your interests, so you'll never be bored

2. Cry on it

When that first student loan bill comes in, you aren't going to be able to afford tissues for at least the next 9 years. You can just mop up your tears on your degree instead. I mean, you didn't pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for a useless piece of paper, and since it can't find you a job, you might as well put it to some use

3. Expensive Kindling

When the inevitable zombie apocalypse hits the planet, the world's paper supply will definitely shorten. With that in mind, you can always burn your degree as kindling to start a fire that will eventually get you found by zombies.

4. Extra Paper

Need to write down your schedule for McDonald's? Unsuccessfully tried to memorize the Starbuck's secret menu? Forgot when you scheduled your dentist appointment? Well, thankfully, you have an extra sheet of paper lying around now!

5. A Hiding Spot

Of course, we all need to buckle down and get a roommate or two after college. Therefore, the glass casing on your degree can serve as a great hiding spot for the last $10 you have to your name from your roommates that are also poor from their multi-thousand dollar degrees.

6. Hold It Over Your Sibling's Head, Literally And Figuratively

Whenever you argue with your younger sibling, you can always, always pull the "I know more than you, I have degree. I went to college!" and you can proudly display that worthless piece of paper and have your baby sibling concede to you. Until they graduate from college themselves and figure out everything you told them about being an adult is a lie.

7. A Conversation Piece

Whenever your family gets bored at gatherings and holidays, they always have your useless degree to turn to for conversation! "Honestly, I tried to tell him that medical school was going to be too hard for him." "Why didn't anyone tell her she can't find a job with a liberal arts degree anymore." "See? I bet you were wishing you majored in computer science now! Hahaha," and so on. Your family will never run out of ways to bash the fact that you can't find a job in your chosen career field, and will have something to talk about at every function from then there on, until the Baby Boomers retire or something.

With all that in mind, keep working hard and studying up for finals. We're on the homestretch now, and need to keep up the good work if we want the multifaceted tool that is a Bachelor's Degree.

Happy Studying!

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

12 Midnight NYE: Fun Ideas!

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

12913
Friends celebrating the New Years!
StableDiffusion

When the clock strikes twelve midnight on New Year's Eve, do you ever find yourself lost regarding what to do during that big moment? It's a very important moment. It is the first moment of the New Year, doesn't it seem like you should be doing something grand, something meaningful, something spontaneous? Sure, many decide to spend the moment on the lips of another, but what good is that? Take a look at these other suggestions on how to ring in the New Year that are much more spectacular and exciting than a simple little kiss.

Keep Reading...Show less
piano
Digital Trends

I am very serious about the Christmas season. It's one of my favorite things, and I love it all from gift-giving to baking to the decorations, but I especially love Christmas music. Here are 11 songs you should consider adding to your Christmas playlists.

Keep Reading...Show less
campus
CampusExplorer

New year, new semester, not the same old thing. This semester will be a semester to redeem all the mistakes made in the previous five months.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

Let's face it, last semester you woke up with enough time to brush your teeth and get to class and even then you were about 10 minutes late and rollin' in with some pretty unfortunate bed head. This semester we will set our alarms, wake up with time to get ready, and get to class on time!

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

The 5 Painfully True Stages Of Camping Out At The Library

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

2295
woman reading a book while sitting on black leather 3-seat couch
Photo by Seven Shooter on Unsplash

And so it begins.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

Camping out at the library is not for the faint of heart. You need to go in as a warrior. You usually have brought supplies (laptop, chargers, and textbooks) and sustenance (water, snacks, and blanket/sweatpants) since the battle will be for an undetermined length of time. Perhaps it is one assignment or perhaps it's four. You are motivated and prepared; you don’t doubt the assignment(s) will take time, but you know it couldn’t be that long.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

The 14 Stages Of The Last Week Of Class

You need sleep, but also have 13 things due in the span of 4 days.

1417
black marker on notebook

December... it's full of finals, due dates, Mariah Carey, and the holidays. It's the worst time of the year, but the best because after finals, you get to not think about classes for a month and catch up on all the sleep you lost throughout the semester. But what's worse than finals week is the last week of classes, when all the due dates you've put off can no longer be put off anymore.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments