Whether you’re a freshman in college or about to graduate, everyone searches for the lifelong group of friends they can always count on after school. These are the friends who will be at your wedding, the ones who will be God-Parents to your kids and the ones who will make constant random trips to visit no matter what time of the year. They are there for you through thick and thin, and you are incredibly grateful that you have had the chance to meet them during your time in school. But the question is, how is it possible to find these people in a sea of thousands of students? How do I know from an organization of a 100+ people that one (or more) could be a friend that I turn to for years to come? Here are seven tips for finding your lifelong friends in college:
1. Be the kind of friend you want to have.
It’s extremely easy to have a wish list of qualities you want in the perfect type of friend, but if you aren’t able to live up to the standards you layout for someone else, how can you expect them to do the same? Be the type of friend that you want to have and eventually that person will come.
2. Only invest in people who want to invest in you.
Friendship is a two-way street. If someone isn’t investing as much time as you are into a friendship, there’s most likely a reason. Have a friend who will run the same extra miles you do and that you aren’t the ones always making the plans.
3. Steer clear from gossip.
As if it wasn’t obvious, we are not in high school. If you have a friend who finds it way to easy to talk about you behind your back, they probably aren’t the type of friend you want in your life. Those who gossip are usually looking for a little extra attention in their life, so if you can’t trust that your friend won’t do this you’re out of luck.
4. Be with people who make you feel comfortable.
The worst thing to have is to have a friend where you always feel like you have to have a constant filter whenever you’re around them; good friends love you for your quirks.
5. Find a friend who is just as excited about your accomplishments as they are with theirs.
This goes without saying, but if you find that you have a friend who is constantly jealous when you succeed or only happy when they succeed, that friend is not the kind of friend you want to have. You want a friend who is excited with your accomplishments just as much as they are with theirs because when you succeed in life, so do they.
6. Get involved in school and your community
You’ll never meet more people in your college career than when you join organizations in your school and in your community. Whether its Greek life, academic societies, leadership organizations or a religious group, these organizations will be filled with people who will love and care for you no matter what. It is in these groups where you will be able to find some of your closest friends in college.
7. Don’t be afraid to let go of a friendship.
Sometimes you cannot make every friendship work. If you always seem to be in a constant battle in your friendship, it most likely isn’t worth it. There’s no shame in letting go, so make sure you always trust your instincts.