Dieting is not easy, especially when you have little to no will power like me. The amount of times I have said I am going to start a diet and never follow through is too many to count. But, since freshman fifteen is TOTALLY REAL this summer I have decided to actually be serious about dieting and fitness. I probably picked the worst time to diet because um duh, summer screams soft serve ice cream and fried dough; but is there ever an actual good time to start a diet? The answer to that is no.
1. "Here we go again, time to see that (not so) lovely number on the scale."
Okay.... not as bad I thought. I can work with this.
2. "I probably should throw out those homemade cookies I made three days ago."
*Takes a bite of a cookie* aaaaand this is why I am on a diet.
3. "This diet is going to be like so different than any of my other diets. I am actually going to stick to this!"
#LowCarb #LowSugar #SoBasicallyHell
4. "I'm going to spice some things up at the gym and try a few on those Instagram workout videos. Those girls sure do make it look easy!"
Um, how do I work this thing? Do I look like an idiot? Yeah, probably. *Slowly walks away and hopes no one saw.*
5. "I ate so healthy today I like totally lost at least 5 pounds."
*Checks scale* *Gains 2 pounds* Oh, what the heck.
6. "Should I join Weight Watchers to keep me in line? I totally should."
Yeah, um, this whole 23 freestyle points a day is just like, not cutting it. I am going to need around 60.
7. "So... when is cheat day?"
Oh, you mean I've only been on this diet for 48 hours? So, it's not cheat day yet? But, but, I need bread and ice cream. NOW.