I love my mom. I honestly do and she has been nothing but a strong, supportive force in my life. She is a nurse and she's been a nurse for over half of her life. If you were raised by a nurse, you completely understand. If not, here, take a walk into our childhood.
1. Medical tape works wonders.
Sometimes, you run out of very common office supplies at your house. But never fear! If you're the child of a nurse, you're more than likely to find some substitutes around somewhere. Medical tape can be used for almost everything - sticky tack, a bandage, a command strip... Scotch tape. You can use gauze instead of paper towels (for bleeding cuts) and there's almost always a pair of bandage scissors somewhere.
2. "I don't feel good," is never just "I don't feel good."
A nurse is around diagnosed patients every day. You can't give them a blanketed statement like that ... they're going to want details. What's wrong? What hurts? Is your throat scratchy? They want to know colors, textures, time frames... everything. It makes you start getting creative with how to play hookie because faking the flu simply no longer works.
3. A nurse's child almost never goes to the hospital.
Because of the previous item on this list. Unless a nurse has no clue what is wrong with you or knows that it is extremely dire, you're not going anywhere. My mom's favorite line was "Take two Ibuprofen and go to sleep." I can't even get mad about this because she was almost always right - pain killers and sleep can cure almost any ailment.
4. You start to think you too have earned your medical degree.
You've heard about it all. From pink eye to bronchitis, because of the years you've spent listening to your parent talk about medical diagnoses, you are confident in your abilities. You're like a human Web MD. That means that you really don't have a leg to stand on but you do always know the worst case scenario to tell people.
5. You've started to question what "proper" dinner time conversation actually is.
You've built up your tolerance to disgusting table conversations over the last few years. A nurse's job is not always glamorous so you have a bunch of stories stocked up in your arsenal. However, this does make eating with friends a bit more difficult. They don't have the same tolerance as you... they just think you're disgusting.
6. There was no B.S. when it came to talking about your body.
There were no cute nicknames. You knew the specific and medical term for every body part. You knew exactly what was going on - even if you didn't ask. Everything was very medical and scientific. It also usually fell into dinnertime conversation so you couldn't escape it. You were cornered.
7. Medical shows lost their luster.
Shows like "Grey's Anatomy," "ER," and "Chicago Med," simply lost their flair when your parent started telling you the diagnosis before the doctor did. You also know realize when those TV hospitals are doing things that are against regulation. You can spot a HIPPA violation miles away.
