Recreating during a global pandemic is, at the very least, frustrating and, at the very worst, dangerous. Desperate times call for desperate measures, and the intense cabin fever and internet fatigue drove me to attempt the unthinkable: camping. If you're like me, you might be at the point in this global pandemic where you are willing to sh*t in a hole in the woods to get away from your family. As a tender-footed camping newbie who enjoys a good hike but is also very partial to showers and toilets, here's my advice:

Do Your Research

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First, you need to figure out where you are going and why. Do you want to swim? Hike? Bird watch? Summon demons? Watch bird? How far are you willing to travel? HipCamp was a lifesaver when I was just beginning to consider sleeping in a tent. You can find everything from free, secluded campsites to glamping cabins. Each site lists the price, amenities available, activities available, a general location, and reviews from other campers.

Be Realistic

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Before you select a site, you need to have an honest conversation with yourself about whether or not you are ready to squat behind a tree and sh*t in a hole. Plenty of cheap, exciting campsites have bathrooms, showers, and wells. Especially if it's your first time camping, there's no shame in wanting a toilet nearby.

Find the right camping buddy

Listen. There is no wifi in the woods. There is no TV in the woods. There is you, trees, grass, mosquitos, and whoever you brought with you. You need a camping buddy who can hold a conversation and who won't have a meltdown if and when a bug lands on their hot dog. If you're not confident that you could set up a tent and start a campfire together without becoming indefinitely estranged, then they're not the one or ones for this adventure. Camp with people you love, not people you want to get to know better. Camping is not a first date, or, God forbid, a Tinder date. I don't care how hot Chad looks in his profile picture, you will want to murder him when bugs are feasting on your blood, you smell like a dying animal, and he's been talking about the various merits of campus bars for hours.

Plan Ahead

You need to eat unspoiled food that is not gross and will sustain you during any and all activities you have planned. How will you cook outside and what do you need to do it? Figure out how far you are traveling, how to get there, and have a plan in case you lose service. How much time do you want to spend at the campsite? How many activities do you have time for? Are there fun antique stores, ice cream shops, or sights along the way? Maybe you want to spend the night in multiple locations or visit a nearby lake. Regardless of where you live, there are interesting things to safely do and see. We have more time than ever. Take advantage of it.

Be Respectful

Even when you're outside, you should wear a mask when you talk to other campers and use shared facilities. It's just polite. Also, be sure to comply with the Center for Outdoor Ethics' Leave No Trace Policy. There are 7 principles to the Leave No Trace policy, including respecting other campers, leaving what you find, and safely disposing of all garbage and waste. Nature did not magically become a frat house when the bars closed. Pack trash bags, masks, and cleaning supplies. Clean up after yourself, don't be a jerk, and remember that it's a privilege to recreate in the first place.

Relax!

You do not need to have massive calf muscles and an expensive mountain bike to enjoy camping. You do not need to look a certain way or have an active lifestyle to benefit from unplugging and looking at the stars for a while. Camping can be whatever you need from it. Pressuring yourself to hike a certain amount of miles or check off items on a bucket list defeats the purpose of recreation by stressing you out. Take a nap, wander around, read a book, and enjoy seeing something other than your bedroom walls.