Whether you’re a busy high schooler, a high-strung college student, or an adult tasked with an important mission (caring for a baby, preparing a project, etc.), an all-nighter may be largely unavoidable. More than just a culmination of poor time management and bad luck, it can be a symptom of the largely under-diagnosed complex I like to call “Your Life Is A Mess” (patent pending). And despite the havoc one night without sleep can wreak on one’s body, it is often glorified (much like being terrible at math and being addicted to caffeine is), when it shouldn’t be. Unfortunately, I’ve recently had a run-in with the enigmatic “all-nighter.” Here are its stages, as told by an amateur (seeking professional status) sleeper.

1. Realizing that you are woefully under-prepared for the next day.

You have two major assessments and a presentation to give tomorrow? Look no further; the all-nighter is here! And don't worry, it's completely free (apart from hindered cognitive functioning, elevated likelihood to develop depression and irritability, and greater risk of developing life-threatening health problems like diabetes).

2. It's 1 a.m., and food is life.

We have two opposing hunger hormones that control our appetite: leptin and ghrelin. Sleep deprivation curtails these hormones' ability to accurately determine our body's needed caloric intake, leading us to excessively consume freely available food. Our body's reduction in leptin, the appetite suppressant, and elevation in ghrelin, the appetite stimulant, is why people tend to suddenly find everything in their pantry appealing and absolutely necessary to consume in order to prevent starvation. This, coupled with heightened blood glucose levels, is why amount of sleep is inversely correlated to BMI and risk of diabetes.

3. It's 2 a.m., and you've read the same sentence 49 times.

Functional MRIs and PET scans show that the thalamus and prefrontal cortex are the most vulnerable to sleep deprivation. The prefrontal cortex controls our attention and working memory, and various studies show that subjects with prolonged wakefulness perform simple tasks with less speed and accuracy than their well-rested counterparts. If you talked to a person a minute ago, you may not be able to identify their face, recall what your conversation was about, and later, even remember the conversation took place at all.

4. It's 3 a.m., and "I honestly feel so attacked right now."

We might be a bit emotional because sleep deprivation has prevented our prefrontal cortex from properly regulating judgment and emotion. That's why sleep deprived individuals engage in risky behavior, are irritated quickly, and are overly emotional. Maybe you wouldn't have reacted to that beautifully played Beethoven Sonata before, but now you're tearing up within the first minute. You wish perpetual ill-tidings on the person who let their cat fall off a table for YouTube views, and cry during a 30-second vaccine commercial.

5. It's 4 a.m., and you get a text back.

When you need help with a question but no one is awake, you count on at least one person who happened to stay up just as late as you did. You might be a little over-emotional about it (that darn prefrontal cortex), but the moment you get a text back, you know there is no feeling stronger than the sense of gratitude you feel as your phone vibrates at four in the morning.

6. It's 5 a.m., and Your Life Is A Mess™

Forgoing sleep for even one night can elevate our levels of cortisol, the stress hormone. It also puts us at a greater risk of developing anxiety and depression. And while insomniacs are 20 times more likely to suffer from panic attacks than the average person, one night of wakefulness alone can cause short term anxiety that has the potential to develop into a more serious issue. The effects of an all-nighter extend for several days, or even a week after the night iteslf. That means that staying up on Sunday may affect your performance on that Wednesday interview, Thursday quiz, or Friday oral assessment.

7. It's 6 a.m., and you're confident in your abilities.

You may not remember your mom's maiden name, but at least you know that the mitochondrion is the powerhouse of the cell. Or is it the ribosome? No, the ribosome packages proteins for secretion. Wait, then what does a Golgi body do? Ah, it'll work out. Remember to take the derivative and multiply by the base. And every action has an equal and opposite…abstraction? Close enough.

8. It's 8 a.m., and you regret everything.

Suddenly, you feel nauseous, fatigued and pained at the same time. This is because your circadian clock, which deals with day-to-night regulation of our body's hormones, is completely out of sync with reality. Light and food are supposed to stimulate certain hormones at certain times of the day, but since you've been continuously eating and exposed to light, your internal signalling has become confused. At this point, the only thing that will make you feel better is sleep. Unfortunately, the day is about to start.

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The next time you're thinking about pulling an all-nighter, know that even Andy Dwyer - part-time children's performer, part-time FBI agent, part-time rockstar - would probably still fall victim to his body's biology after a sleepless night. You are not invincible. Unless the marginal benefits (getting work done) absolutely outweigh the marginal costs (stress, unhappiness, weight gain, dying early, etc.), listen to your body when it tells you to sleep.