*Disclaimer: I don’t wish to take away from friends I have met in college who I love and hope I will always be friends with. I only wish to praise an old and deep friendship that I cherish and always will.
When approaching high school graduation, you hear a lot of rumors about never seeing your classmates again, making better friends in college, and losing close bonds that you’ve spent the last four years of your life forming. There are even some negative connotations attached to college students who would rather be hanging out with someone from back home than your new roommates and classmates you just met. High school seniors and college freshmen, I’m here to tell you that this doesn’t have to be the case. While I have lost touch with a lot of people who used to be like brothers and sisters to me in the past few months, and I’ve made several great new friends along the way, high school friends don’t have to stay in high school.
Your friendships with people you grew up with don’t have to disappear, or even change very much. That is your decision to make and no one else’s. Never let people make you feel like you’re “stuck in high school” because you know you still hang out with old friends. I know from personal experience that some high school friends can be the best friends you’ll ever make. My best friend and I have gone to school together since kindergarten, been good friends since middle school, and best friends all through high school. We’ve been inseparable for four years, and though we go to different colleges in different states, we didn’t see any reason for that to change.
So here are 7 reasons why my high school best friend will always be my best friend, and that’s OK with me:
1. We know everything about each other.
In my first semester of college, I felt I was constantly having to introduce myself, my name, my hometown, and my major, and a lot of times that was as deep as it went. In some ways it was exciting because no one knew you. But in other ways, it was really hard because no one knew you. They don’t know what you like to do, where you like to eat, when you need to be alone, or what your sense of humor was. But with my best friend, I know when she’s upset, and when she’s joking. I don’t get offended when she falls asleep in the middle of a deep conversation, or freaked out when she starts yelling nonsensical words in her sleep because I know she does that. She knows when I need to stay home, or when I need to go out and have fun. She knows everything that’s ever happened to me because she’s been there for me through it all.
2. I can tell her anything.
There are no secrets. There’s no judgement. There is always the benefit of the doubt. She knows who I am and what I stand for. In college, everyday you’re making first impressions on people. You could say or do something once that rubs them the wrong way, and that’s how they’ll remember you. It’s nice to have someone to lean on that you don’t have to be on your toes with. You can be you and say every thought that pops into your head, or anything you’ve ever done and know that it’s ok with them.
3. We’re honest with little regard to feelings.
If I’m getting on her nerves, she’s gonna tell me to shut up. If she is about to do something idiotic, I’ll tell her to stop. And that’s ok. No hurt feelings because we know we both are only looking out for each other, and nothing could change that. There is no flattery or smoke-blowing or fluff to curb feelings. There is only total truth because that’s how we like it.
4. We don’t have to be doing anything to have the best time ever.
Whether we’re driving around Florence for an hour with no destination, laying on my couch watching a movie, or pigging out on Blue Coast or cookie dough, it’s always a good time when we hang out. With new friends, there is always the pressure to go and do and have the most fun time ever, and that’s always great and really fun, but sometimes you don’t want to go and do. You want to sit and eat and talk about life, death, memories, futures, and blue triangles. That’s when I hit up my high school best friend.
5. We don’t get jealous of the other’s boyfriends.
At different points in our friendship, we’ve both been involved in serious relationships. There are two basic things we understand about each other’s boyfriends: 1. When you say, “Don’t tell anyone but…” that does not include our boyfriends. No matter what the news or big secret or funny story is, we’re always allowed to tell our boyfriends if we need/ want to. And 2. Sometimes we’re going to choose our boyfriends over each other, and we’re both OK with that. We’re never jealous in these moments and don’t resent one another, or the guy, for this. That’s a rare quality in a friendship.
6. We have so many inside jokes and old stories.
Almost all our memories over the past several years have involved each other. It’s hard to go somewhere and make totally new friends and totally new memories and not be able to be like, “Hey remember that time we were like 13 and…” because they don’t. It’s fun to sit and think about the dark ages of middle school, reminisce about old basketball games, laugh at old jokes , or think back to when you first got your license and your adventures truly began. That’s always fun. It’s familiar. You’ve been doing it your whole life. You hope you can do it for the rest of your life.
7. Our friendship has only gotten better since May 15, 2016.
We used to joke that we would go away to college and forget each other, but we both knew full and well that would never happen. However, I don’t think we expected our friendship to get even better after gradation. But it did. Because we both love our hometown of Florence almost as much as we love each other, we both come home from college whenever we can. We still hang out on those days, and it’s just like old times, except with much more news of our lives. In high school, if something happened in our lives we couldn’t wait till the next day to talk about it. Now, when we go weeks without seeing other, instead of one story we have to share, it’s a million. But that just makes our spend-the-night parties, weekend college visits, or destination-less drives around town so much more exciting.
So yeah. Go to college. Meet new people. Try new things. Enjoy these years of your life, but don’t forget the people that are part of you and every memory you have. It’s nice to have a familiar face, a pig-out buddy, an incentive to go home, a partner in crime, and a high school best friend that will be your best friend forever and ever.
**This post is dedicated to my best friend Abbi Gooch. Thanks for being you. Love, your bestie for the restie**
