When getting ready to search for the college of your dreams, it’s inevitable that you’re going to take a peek through the college pamphlet. Here is where you will find the necessities to get you through college. The pamphlet will be filled with information like bringing a mattress topper to college with you, a shower caddy, and a mini fridge. It will also have a list of clubs you can join on campus, which will help you get involved more with the University you will be attending. And of course, there will be a map of the campus - which I’m sure you will not use whatsoever. A lot of basic information is inside of a college pamphlet, that you probably already knew. To top it off, there will probably be a picture of a couple of students studying together, with a huge smile on their face. Let’s be realistic; who actually studies with a smile on their face?
It seems like a lot of college pamphlets have forgotten to add in the key components to surviving college. Here are 6 things that a college pamphlet won’t tell you:
1. Cheap alcohol is your friend.
You’re a broke college student. With that being said, you need to buy cheap alcohol. Burnett’s, Dubra, Rubinoff, New Amsterdam, etc. It all gets the job done just the same. Your hangover might be brutal the next morning, but your bank account will be thanking you. The goal is to get drunk, not get (more) broke.
2.Leave your crops tops at home.
Unless you plan on wearing a crop top with HIGH waisted jeans, or shorts, leave them at home! Crop tops and low rise jeans are NOT a thing. I’m not sure who created that look, but they really shouldn’t have.
3. Use your best friend as a scapegoat.
You’re going to be hit on by a little of creeps - it’s inevitable. But, that’s what best friends are for! If a guy comes up to you, there are so many excuses to get away from him. “My best friend is throwing up.” “My best friend needs me.” “My best friend needs to use the bathroom.” “My best friend needs me to go home with her.” “My best friend is actually my girlfriend.” When in doubt, pull the best friend card.
4. The dining hall is your worst enemy.
Walking into the dining hall, you will see many options. Pizza, french fries, cookies, cheeseburgers, etc. There’s an endless amount of fried goods, and desserts. This is dangerous. Let me tell you, the freshman 15 is real - and it is scary. Before you know it, you’re a month into school and your pants can barely button. If you’re lucky, the pizza, mac n cheese, and french fries will go right to your ass. If that’s the case, then eating all that greasy food actually can benefit you.
5. Don’t go to a party with a backpack.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT, go to a frat party with a backpack. You’re basically screaming, “Hey! I’m a Freshman!” We all know your Chem 101 textbook and notepad aren’t in there. If you’re underage and carrying around a bookbag full of booze, just don’t. That’s a recipe for disaster. The same rule applies for lanyards around the neck - just don’t.
6. Wine nights are never just “wine nights.”
When your friends ask you to have a wine night, prepare yourself - because wine nights lead to very intoxicated girls. It always starts off as a relaxing night, with wine, snacks, and maybe a good movie. But, it ends up with drunk girls screaming and dancing to “Hips Don’t Lie.” If you’re having a wine night, get ready to deal with the hangover the next day.
Now, if only college pamphlets told us all this information - then we would be a little more prepared!
