Here you are, preparing to rush a sorority. I know how you’re feeling: nervous, intimidated, excited, and most importantly, confused of what to expect. I know the feeling because I rushed my sorority only two months ago and trust me—I was terrified.
Rush itself, I’m not going to lie to you, is very overwhelming. Every school’s rush process is completely different, but if yours is anything like mine, it consists of long hours of walking from house to house, along with four different waves of cuts between each round. Again- a long and intimidating process.
I know that it’s scary, but hopefully, this advice can help ease your nerves (at least a little bit) because these are some things I wish I would have known before rushing:
1. Be yourself
*cue eye roll*
Yes, I know that during this process that’s all everyone tells you. “Be yourself!” “Don’t act like someone you’re not!” But people are only telling you this because it’s 100% true.
Rush is this experience where you are, not to sugar coat it, being judged by your personality. But every single person I know that is in a sorority fits in perfectly there. So when you're having conversations with the older girls, don't overthink it.
Smile, be friendly, and if it flows then it flows. You cannot force a connection, so don't try to. Just be yourself and I promise you will end up in a chapter where the girls thought you would fit in. But...
2. Don't be devastated if you get dropped from a house
I know the whole idea of rejection is terrifying, but trust me- it happens to 90% of girls. It happened to me, it happened to all of my friends, and it may happen to you too. Not every house is going to ask you back. And maybe, you won't even be asked back to a house you really thought you were going to be in.
Although disappointing, don't take it personally. If you thought you had a good conversation, you probably did! But not every sorority can keep every girl they rush, even the ones that would probably really fit in there. Trust me, it all works out for a reason. The way I thought about it, if I didn't get cut from that house, I wouldn't have been in my chapter, and wouldn't have met my best friends. Which brings me to...
3. You will meet great friends, but you can also have best friends in other sororities
Before choosing a chapter, I put so much pressure on the idea that whichever sorority I am a part of will be my only source of social life. Believe me when I tell you that this isn't true! There will be great girls in whatever sorority you choose to join, but there may be some that you don't click with- especially during freshman year. And that's okay!
You aren't meant to be best friends with everyone. Plus, although sorority life definitely gives you a new social circle and girls to pregame with, you can still meet up with your friends from other sororities later in the night. Nothing is set in stone, so don't panic if you don't find your best friends right away.
4. Seriously, put the stereotypes aside
This one is huge. Before going through the rushing process, I- and most girls- already had an idea of the "good houses" and the "bad houses." I only knew of around 4 out of the 16 sororities at my school before going to every house, and let me tell you, my opinions definitely changed.
When you keep the stereotypes in your head, it can prevent you from joining a chapter you may really connect with. It may also keep you very closed-minded from giving other chapters that you may not have known of before a chance. I can tell you that before rush, I wasn't so familiar with the chapter I'm in. This was only because no one from my high school had ever been in it before.
But when I first stepped into the house, I fell in love with it. So in the end, ignore the rumors. But also...
5. Look at the girls around you
When I say this, I don't only mean the older girls that are rushing you, but rather the people on your rush lines. Who is going back to the same houses as you? Do you like and connect with these girls? Do you see a pattern of specific types of people going to specific houses?
Pay attention to these things, because these girls may be in your pledge class. I know that there are many girls who I became good friends with on my rush line that are now in my sorority. It's not a coincidence, we're obviously very similar people and were meant to be friends!
6. In the end, follow your gut
It's always easier said than done when told to "go with your gut." Take it from someone who was crying the last night of rush when having to choose which sorority she wanted to put as number 1.
Even though I knew all along what I wanted, it was still a scary and huge decision to make. But just like when choosing a college, it all comes down to what the voice is telling you in the back of your head. For me, it was hearing my best friend telling me to do the opposite sorority than I chose. I know, that probably should have made me doubt my decision more. Yet, hearing her say the other sorority out loud, I knew inside that it's not where I could see myself ultimately ending up.
It was not an easy decision because every sorority has their pro's and con's, but in the end, you will never be happy if you know you made the decision that was right for you.
Overall, I compared rushing a sorority to applying for college. You have the sororities you could really see yourself in, you have the ones you may not have originally saw yourself in but surprisingly you loved them, and you have the ones you aren't so into.
You can get rejected, you can end up somewhere you never expected, or you could get into your favorite. But in the end, you're going to be in the place you're meant to be in. You will meet great girls and make amazing memories- that I can promise you. Good luck and don't overthink it!