We know that you are just trying to help us. We get it. But, after the twentieth time hearing something, the helpfulness goes away. Most of us can pinpoint one or two phrases that make us wish we were born a year earlier so that we could just be sophomores already. These are the five most annoying things for freshman to hear:
1. "You are still a baby/child."
Yes, we may still act like a child sometimes (a good portion of the time), but we do not always like it being pointed out to us. Yes, we occasionally do need you to point it out, like when we make really horrible choices, but maybe don't say it quite like this.
2. "What is your major? Oh, you will probably change a million times."
Ok. Really? In some cases, this is helpful. When reassuring someone who is changing their life plan, please use this phrase. If you are talking to someone, though, who has even the slightest passion or desire for their current major, this phrase lands on deaf ears. We don't really want to hear how you think our major is wrong for us, or how you think we won't stick to it. We realize that you are just trying to help, but we want to fail on our own. That way we at least tried what we wanted.
3. "You better not be stressed already. You are just in your first semester!"
Ummmm, the first semester seems like it warrants some stress to me. Moving away from home, living with someone we have probably never met, and for the first time ever, for most people, we have a full load of college classes. Yep, that can lean it self towards being stressful. We get that you have graduated or are an upperclassmen and have perspective, but sometimes we just need to hear that it's ok to be stressed out and that it does not mean we won't make it to senior year.
4. "Don't gain the freshman 15!"
This is not necessary. We are already insecure and thinking way too much about our eating habits. Just steer clear of this phrase completely. Freshman year is the perfect time to be comforted by Fudge Rounds and Moose Tracks ice cream. That is just how it is.
5. "Join clubs and get involved! I made friends in college that I still have now!"
This statement may seem harmless, but it isn't. We already feel a pressure to make friends and start a new life, so every added push just raises our level of stress. Also, this makes us believe that we have to find our friends for life in college. Which just is not true. For all of us introverts, this phrase makes us want to stay in our room for a week. We will get involved, but it will be at our own pace, which is most likely a slow one.
Most people are guilty of saying at least two of these phrases, maybe even just last week--especially if you have a freshman you are close to. We are insanely lucky to have people that care enough to want to discuss our life. But, maybe next time just avoid these phrases. That will make the conversation go MUCH smoother.
