You're caught in an impossible decision. You're being torn every which way imaginable. You don't know who else you can turn to or seek out for advice. You feel trapped in this never-ending circle, this internal battle with yourself. You just don't know what to do.
Does this sound like you?
I'm going to help you out with your seemingly impossible dilemma. By the end of this article you will, hopefully, come to the "right" decision and finally be able to put the whole issue to bed.
1. Have you made a pros and cons list?
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Let's look at the situation logically, first. Put your feelings aside for the moment and look at the facts. What are the benefits of making one choice over the other? What are the downsides? Look at it from a cost-benefit point of view, too. What do you have to give up to make one choice over another - and is that worth it?
2. What does your gut say?
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Okay, we can let all those feelings back in. It's usually unwise to let your feelings drive all of the important decisions in your life. But sometimes, there's just a feeling in your gut and you know what you have to do even if you don't want to do it.
3. Have you reached out and talked about the issue with two or more people?
If not, you should! You could even ask for a stranger's advice if you have to, but definitely don't make this decision alone. And a word to the wise: Don't ask the internet. You will find arguments in support for both sides and that won't make the decision any easier. If you have asked more than two people, then you are probably ready to make a decision. If you have asked people who know and care about you, and they're (almost) all saying the same thing, trust your loved ones. They want to support you and see you grow, I doubt they'd purposely try to lead you astray.
4. What's the worst case scenario for making either choice? For making no choice, is there a deadline?
This is similar to making that pros and cons list. But sometimes we get so caught up in the details and worrying that things get a little blown out of proportion. Take a step back and look at the bigger picture. Realize that whatever you decide, things will turn out okay in the end. If the choice has been weighing on your mind for a while, take a moment to reflect on the consequences - if any - if you don't make a decision. If there's a deadline coming up, don't rush yourself, but don't put off looking inside of yourself for the right decision.
5. What are you afraid of? Why is it such a hard choice?
Is there anything else that is keeping you from making a clear choice? Why is it inhibiting you? Really take some time to reflect on this one and don't skim over it. If you can, maybe open a word document or write down on paper what is motivating your fear. If there is a root issue that can be addressed, not only will that help you make your decision but it will make you a stronger and better person.
6. Why are you reading this article?
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You are reading this for a reason, yeah? Maybe, just like how when you flip a coin, you clicked on this article and suddenly knew what the right choice was and hoped I would tell you what you wanted to hear. I know you have been thinking carefully about the choice in front of you. No one can make this decision but you. It can be really hard to do the "right" thing - if the right thing even exists! But trust that there are people who will love and support you no matter what you decide. Be brave!
