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500 Words on Writer's Block

Something funny to get your mind off your paper due in 20 Minutes

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500 Words on Writer's Block
Author's Own

Imagine this: you've been sitting in the library, or study room, or even on your bed all day long. Your paper is due at midnight. It's 11:25 pm. You have only your name typed. Either you didn't pay attention in class or you're like me, experiencing writer's block.

I looked up the definition to Writer's Block. Google says it is:

  1. the condition of being unable to think of what to write or how to proceed with writing.

Writer's block sucks, plain to say. I experience it all the time. I experienced it before writing this article. I took two days to figure out what to write and I decided to write an ode to every author and student's best friend.

Writer's block, oh how I loathe thee. You cause me such grief when I'm stuck. You give me anxiety, you make me eat everything in my house. Why must you torment me so? I know I procrastinate by binge watching Supernatural on Netflix, but give me a break every now and then, I want to have a life too. I know my paper is due, the emails remind me so. My mind won't function, my coffee is cold. Oh please let me be, Writer's block. I beg of thee.

Okay, I'm no Dr. Seuss or Shakespeare. But I'm sure most everyone can relate. We procrastinate until right before a paper is due, and chu chu! Our train of thought leaves the station. So we pull whatever garbage we can out of our butts, throw it up on paper, hope and pray to God that our professor will let us fix it and revise it later, then go to sleep (in my case, I don't know what sleep is).

I don't intend on this to be a serious article at all, I want people to read it and laugh and think "That's exactly how I feel". Writer's block isn't a serious issue to most people. It's about as annoying as an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend. But it's still bothersome. I've caught myself screaming and going all out Hulk when I can't write. But it's never that serious. I've even told a professor I had no clue what to write so I just didn't write my paper. She gave me a slight extension. Not every professor is like that (but we wish they were).

So next time you have a paper due, don't procrastinate. Don't let writer's block get the best of you. Sit down and "do the damn thing". Eat all the junk food at the house, make a rhyme or two to get the juices flowing, drink some coffee or vodka or the souls of your enemies (whatever your taste prefers), breathe in, and let your masterpiece get you a B-. It's just that simple for some people.

For others, like me, well. We're screwed. Might as well start asking for that time extension.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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