The biggest night in Hollywood. The Hollywood Prom. The Superbowl of Hollywood. Whatever you want to call it, it's a big, expensive night in Hollywood. For us regular people, it's just a night of watching famous people be recognized for the famous things they've done. It's Hollywood's world and we're just living in it. Yet, we can't get enough of it. There is a definite list of things that run through everyone's head while watching the Oscars.
1. Do you think Giuliana Rancic gets star struck?
2. I'm sorry, but why does Kris Jenner have to be on the TV?
3. Helllllllooooo, Ashley Graham!
4. I can't decide who is best dressed!
5. Alicia Vikander looks like Belle.
6. Can Sandy Powell just not with that red hair and bizarre outfit?
7. Henry Cavill is definitely my personal McDreamy.
8. Heidi Klum, no no no no no.
9. Saoirse Ronan YES.
10. OMG, Leo and Kate together!!!
11. The Red Carpet is great, but can we get to the awards now?
12. Okay, we get it Chris Rock.
13. Yikes, #sororityracist. Poor Ronda.
14. Wait, what is Mad Max about again?
15. Can the designer for Mad Max design a better outfit?
16. Who is "The Academy" and why does everyone keep thanking them?
17. Oh, another award for Mad Max?
18. Jared Leto with the subtle jokes.
19. Okay, the Revenant is DEFINITELY going to win costume design.
20. MAD MAX AGAIN?!
21. Okay, we're gonna have to watch Mad Max after this.
22. What do you think Leonardo DiCaprio is thinking about right now?
23. Rachel McAdams gets more beautiful with age.
24. Finally, Star Wars makes an appearance!
25. Shocker, Mad Max another award.
26. Daaaaaamn, Chris Rock, back at it again with another racist comment.
27. Ex Machina...so robots are going to take over the world?
28. Aw R2D2 is s'cute.
29. Are we getting to the good awards now?
30. I could really go for some Girl Scout Cookies.
31. THE BANANA!
31. I'd like to thank Inside Out for making grown-ups cry.
32. Do we think the aerial silk dancer for the Weeknd will be nominated?
33. How are you ever supposed to be able to choose the best supporting actor?
34. Aw, Mark Rylance is precious.
35. Everyone was thinking it, Louis C.K. was just saying it.
36. Those girl scouts are going to have the coolest field trip ever.
37. Joe Biden just gave a personal shout out to me for taking the ItsOnUs pledge.
38. Lady Gaga, well done.
39. Can Jacob Tremblay win an Oscar for cutest little nugget in all of the land?
40. Glad Brie Lawson won because her dress is so gorgeous.
41. Seriously, do you think Leo is about to freak out?
42. If Leo doesn't win this I'm throwing my phone at the TV.
43. All of the other nominated actors are really great too!!
44. YAY LEO!!!!
45. OMG I've been waiting for this day since the Titanic.
46. "I'll never let go," said Leo to his Oscar.
47. Leo and Kate are messing with my emotions.
48. The Internet hasn't been this hype since Kim K broke it.
49. I really just hope any movie other than Mad Max wins best picture.
50. 4 hours later, I can go to sleep now.
Thank you, Hollywood for giving us this beautiful event each year. And with each year more politics, speeches, activists, tuxedos and flawless dresses than the last.