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5 Tweets That Prove You're Doing Great On Your Own, But You Secretly Hope Josh Will See

Wow, 5 tweets in a row about the Grammy's? She must really miss Josh.

Lily Brundin

Mar 29, 2017

University of North Dakota

5 Tweets That Prove You're Doing Great On Your Own, But You Secretly Hope Josh Will See

Huffington Post

You’re single.

You’re free.

You’re proud.

You need everyone to be aware of how great you’re doing on your own. In case Josh sees.

What better way to announce your independence than to aggressively tweet about it, day and night? Think about it. You don’t want people coming to your twitter, and just assuming that you’re still sad about Josh because all you tweet about is current events and pop culture. Imagine what’s going through their heads! "Wow, 6 tweets in a row about the Grammy’s? She must be trying to cover up how sad she is about Josh." Embarrassing.

Time to reroute. Everything you tweet for the next six months must somehow link back to why you’re doing great on your own. Don’t worry–you don’t have to do it alone. Here are 5 tweets that will prove you’re doing great on your own. Hopefully they get retweeted onto Josh’s timeline.

“I love having a queen-sized bed all to myself #comfy”

This tweet is perfect. It shows everyone that you’re enjoying your freedom. Who’s Josh anyway? But it also says that there’s technically room in your bed for another person. Perfect in case Josh sees.

“Anyone wanna get sushi later?”

This tweet says that you’re cultured, which is great. It also says that you’re single and open to anyone joining you for a spicy tuna roll. Perfect in case Josh sees, because technically he is anyone. And sushi happens to be his favorite food.

“The new x-men movie was amazing”

This tweet screams independence. It’s great because everyone will see that you’re enjoying date-type activities without Josh. But in case Josh sees, it’s perfect because he loves X-Men. So he’ll see that you still have a lot in common.

“I’d rather stay in and eat pizza than go out any night”

This tweet says you’re comfortable with your own company. How independent. But Josh loves pizza, so in case he sees this, it’s safe.

“It’s nice living a drama-free life”

No relationship? No drama. Glad you’re enjoying all of that freedom. But it also says, “Josh, I’m not dramatic anymore, don’t worry.”

These are all guaranteed to make Josh think you’re doing great. I mean everyone else.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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5 Tweets That Prove You're Doing Great On Your Own, But You Secretly Hope Josh Will See

Wow, 5 tweets in a row about the Grammy's? She must really miss Josh.

“I love having a queen-sized bed all to myself #comfy”

“Anyone wanna get sushi later?”

“The new x-men movie was amazing”

“I’d rather stay in and eat pizza than go out any night”

“It’s nice living a drama-free life”

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"I don't want to do things. I want to not do things."

1. When you look at the syllabus and realize there are only three weeks of the semester left; even though the first day was LITERALLY yesterday.

2. You look at your grades and realize they probably aren't as high as they should be, which is a terrifying realization.

3. When you think to yourself at night, "tomorrow, I will wake up early and go to the library ALL day, and, hell, maybe after I'll go to the gym for a little bit, just to push myself that extra mile."

4. Tomorrow actually comes. The inevitable and overpowering sense of procrastination is too strong to overcome.

5. But you DO end up going to the library. Not all day though, but still, a while. But no, you do not go to the gym. Still, you made an effort, so you decide to treat yo' self.

6. When you realize you need to schedule a meeting with your adviser because you need to sign up for classes next semester. But you also realize that since you waited until the last minute, you're going to get stuck with all of the crappy classes.

7. When you low-key try to slip into conversation with your professors that you need extra credit because you're that desperate.

8. When it's already the third time you've seen your adviser in two days because you have no damn clue what you're doing and need all the help you can get.

9. When you apply for a job associated with your major even though you have no experience, but you just want to dive headfirst into the deep end of adulthood and get it over with.

The world is not always sunshine and rainbows, and you do not have to be, either.

It would be so much easier to just pay someone to do it for you

1. Figuring out when to start

2. Searching through list after list to get everything you need

3. Shopping for deals

4. Getting bins to put everything in

5. Figuring what you can’t live without

6. Going through clothes to find what you need

7. Finding out your siblings took something from you

8. Fighting with your parents.

9. Trying to plan things with your roommate

10. The fear of forgetting something

11. Move in day

Relatable moments from one of the best shows I have ever watched.

1. When you fail that midterm you studied so hard for.

2. When your crush finally texts back.

3. When payday comes around.

4. When you accidentally like someone's picture from 108 weeks ago.

5. When someone takes your unassigned assigned seat.

6. When your favorite character in your favorite TV series dies.

7. When that guy/girl you’ve been crushing on agrees to go on a date with you.

8. When you have so much to do, and such little motivation to do it.

9. When someone asks for your last fry.

10. When you try a new health-food craze.

11. When you get new clothing.

12. When you check your bank account.

13. When they're serving good food in the dining hall.

14. When someone tries to tell you what to do.

15. Or just your thoughts about life in general.

We all have that "I don't care" attitude.

1. Most students just take life day by day.

2. That means procrastinating, one day at a time.

3. College students don't mind dressing like crap sometimes.

4. In fact, dressing nice feels weird.

5. College students get so stressed that they contemplate dropping on a daily basis.

6. But most find another solution to deal with that stress.

7. And that solution can be pretty cheap. Anything over $5 is expensive.

8. One of the only things college students will spend money on is coffee.

9. College is just really expensive and you never forget how expensive it is.

10. But hey, we're getting a somewhat high-quality education, right?

11. We all really just want to pet dogs all day.

12. And eat pizza for every meal.

13. And stab the next person who asks us what we want to do with our life.

14. However, despite the stress and student loans, college is amazing and there's plenty of reasons to smile.

Thank you, April, for inspiring us with your wicked relatability.

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