1. Sometimes if we seem like we are acting antisocial, that is not the case. If we last minute flake out on a plan we may have had, we really are not purposely bailing on you, and it does not mean we do not want to go. Anxious feelings just come over us at times. We can become very nervous, or even begin to feel very sick. It is very upsetting to hear from someone, "Oh, do not invite Julia, she never shows up. She says she is coming and then last second she always flakes out." Well, think that maybe Julia has anxiety, you really do not know.It really does not mean that we do not want to go out, we just cannot control it.
2. Anxiety is exhausting. "You're always tired," is a phrase we commonly hear. That, and, "You're always sick, you must have a bad immune system." Anxiety is mentally and physically draining. Please understand that also sometimes we like to go to bed early, or sleep in very late, tiredness overcomes us almost 24/7.
3. We understand that we are misunderstood. It is probably very difficult for some people who are not suffering with anxiety to fully understand, and that is okay. However, stating, "Everything is going to be okay," may sound reassuring and we appreciate you trying to console us, but we are tired of that one, and very overwhelmed. Please just be there to listen or open armed with a big bear hug. There are some very helpful and positive alternatives as well, such as, "You are strong, the panicking will not last," and/ or, "I am always here for you, I am here to listen"
4. Change is difficult. We tend to take comfort in the way certain things are that make us happy, as any human being does. We also have comfort zones and limits. If your loved one battling anxiety has a limit that may seem silly to you, it is not silly to them. We absolutely cannot control why makes us feel paranoia, so respect the boundaries, please. We handle change differently as well, which makes it harder for us to let go of certain people or things. Just have patience with us.
5. They are not "not normal," just different. Everybody is different in their own way. Also, do not forget that if you handle their difference in a positive manner, they appreciate you, and love you!