From the very beginning of time, people (cough, cough men) have told women that their bodily functions are disgusting. Women have been conditioned to believe that their vaginas should smell like roses and women’s BO doesn’t exist. Just look at the products on the shelves dedicated to keeping women presentable.

I don’t see any Summer's Eve for men, do you?

Still, it’s best if women keep their body parts covered, clean, and out of the public sphere. Unless they’re in the bedroom or in a centerfold, in which case’s we are permitted to undress and be the center of attention.

Sex is just about the only thing a woman can do with her body in the eyes of men which isn’t nasty and that is only if you don’t do too much of it or with too many people. In those cases, you’re a slut with daddy issues... But I digress, ya know what comes after sex? A baby. You know what babies need? Food.

However, breastfeeding isn’t on the prescribed list of “sexy” at the moment so women seen feeding their infant in public are — drum roll please, nasty women.

It seems there is some confusion about the definition of the word "gross" in the Patriarchy’s dictionary so here is a list of 5 things that you do that are actually gross to do in public.

1. Smoking Cigarettes

Not only is smoking deadly to you, but secondhand smoke can also cause cancer in the people around you. Cancer is gross, dude, put it out.

2. Mansplaining

Every time a man tells a woman something she already knows, in a condescending or patronizing way, Hilary Clinton throws up in her mouth. Gross.

3. Biting your nails

This is a habit of the anxious and a gross thing to do in public (or private). Kill two birds with one stone and get a manicure instead.

4. Being rude to your server

Ohhh, you're rude to the staff and ALSO a bad tipper. That's even grosser than the pea soup I had for lunch — which the server DIDN'T MAKE.

5. PDA

Last but not least — public displays of affection. How is a baby sucking on its mother for food gross but Jenny from circulation sucking face with Rick from finance not?

Gross.

The next time you see a woman minding her own business and feeding her child, run this list through your head. Is breastfeeding on it? No. OK, guess it's not gross.