The impression we make on others is a big one. It's something to constantly think about, and especially now as us young adults start to become more independent.
As we get older and grow closer to full-time adulthood, we need to start thinking about those impressions we make. It's important we start to mature and ditch some of the habits that are only OK when we're young.
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We're at the beginning of our 20s, and the beginning of our professional and adult lives. No one will take us seriously as adults if we're still talking about our high school glory days and bringing up things that only seem to matter when you're a first semester freshman in college.
Before the list begins, it feels appropriate to add that talking about or doing these things isn't always bad, and is acceptable in moderation in more private environments. The purpose of this article is to bring to light many of the topics people talk about excessively in public spaces (i.e.parties or social events; social media).
It's important to be aware of our surroundings when we speak and how much we choose to share in certain surroundings.
This article is in no way meant to shame people for things they say, but to remind many young adults (including myself) that how we portray ourselves to a public crowd can always have consequences – large or small.
With that being said, let's get into the top things people should avoid talking about in excess:
1. Your love life (or lack thereof).
Everyone has met these two people: the one who only ever talks about their significant other, shares too much information, or tries to make others jealous of their S.O.
Then there's the complete opposite who only ever complains about being single, past pains from relationships, and how much they get ghosted.
Always talking about your relationship and sharing every detail publicly can make people uncomfortable. Relationships are supposed to have some privacy to them, and it gets very overwhelming for someone to hear about something they are not and cannot be a part of.
It's fine to talk about your relationship, but when it's all that's discussed, that one person seems to turn into two, since themselves and their S.O. is the only topic brought up.
On the other hand, talking about being single is equally exhausting. Everyone has complained about being single at some point. Sometimes we get lonely or are still working through some heartache from a past relationship and we just want to express it a little.
However, it's hard for others to always hear about it. It can bring people down, and often the topic backs people into a corner when they awkwardly search for ways to respond in the conversation. Constant sharing of these feelings on social media is also hard on other people, as people want to feel bad, but also want to see it as a "cry for attention."
Both of these people often lack a filter for personal information and it makes people very uncomfortable knowing far too much all the time. Especially if it's someone they don't know too well or only know in professional environment. It can push people away as they feel it's the only conversation they'll ever have.
2. Your drinking habits.
To a college freshman who's never had alcohol, someone who's constantly drinking and sharing drinking experiences might seem cool, but everyone gets older and drinking starts to lose its flair. The idea of always hanging around someone known as "the trashy drunk" by everyone and not being able to go a day without hearing someone talk about getting wasted starts to lose appeal.
People who think alcohol is required to have good time become boring. They not only rely on alcohol, but they rely on others to give them safe rides, help them stumble across parking lots, get into bed, and make sure they're fed and have water to make the morning easier. Along with this, they're hard-headed and wildly distracted. It turns into babysitting, even if you're doing the minimum, and always dealing with that is annoying.
Other people are having to take care of someone else's drunkeness and hangovers, and those who are constantly drinking only care about themselves having a good time and making sure everyone knows it. It looks irresponsible and attention.
3. Your financial situation.
It's college, we're all broke. Most people struggle, even with jobs. This doesn't make it OK though to remind everyone just how broke you are.
Some people might be doing OK enough to get dinner every now and then or treat themselves to gifts. If you can't, it's not alright to make others feel bad about spending their money how they please. It's not OK to convince friends to not go out because you can't afford it.
If you complain about being broke because you don't work, it's probably time to look into getting a job or doing anything that makes money.
With that, it's also not OK to rub money in other people's faces. If your parents pay for school, an apartment, or going out – that's your business.
If you get large refunds from financial aid, that's fine. It's not fine to always talk about how much you have or make others feel bad if they don't have enough money.
Some people pay for things on their own, so they might not have as much money to go out or pay for luxuries. Making them feel bad for not having so much isn't a good move. Sometimes every penny goes to covering bills and there's satisfaction in working hard to do that, but frustration in not having enough to take part in going out or buying things.
It's terrible to make someone feel bad for not having enough, or because you have more than them.
4. You only speak poorly of a person.
Of course there are some people we aren't fans of. Sometimes ties with friendships have rough endings, sometimes people start some drama, sometimes people just rub others the wrong way.
Not everyone can be buddy-buddy, and sometimes we complain about those people we don't like. When we're always negative though, it can bring others down. Always speaking negatively gets tiring for others, but it says a lot about the person speaking.
If there's good memories with a person, but it doesn't end so well, there's no reason to turn the conversation from reminiscing to smack-talking just because a specific person is brought up. Complaining about friends behind their back, constantly, is a terrible way to act.
Not only does it show negativity, but it shows the inability to move on and be a bigger person. It's not only starting more problems, but it makes you the source and look worse. It also turns you into an unreliable source, as people don't want to trust somebody who is always going to complain and ruin other people's reputations behind their backs.
It's time to take the high road and rethink how you talk about people.
5. You turning every conversation to yourself.
We all like to talk about ourselves and sometimes we turn conversations around just to brag a little. What's not a good move though is to turn it around when the conversation is important to another person.
Lacking sympathy for others is one of the worst traits to have. It's incredibly inconsiderate to take something, like an important story or time of need, from somebody else – just to make it about yourself.
Many people have ignored or cut off others simply because they felt they were more important to listen to. People of all ages do this, and while some see it as a way to assert dominance, it only tears down people's confidence and makes them less trusting.
As we grow older, we need to learn some of the things we talk about out loud and the impressions we make on others are always going to follow us.
It's important we're careful of things we post on social media, and we always keep our future in mind. We're young adults and we're only starting on the impressions we make.
