Life is never easy. It can pick you up one moment and push you down the next. Every single day is filled with events that shape your mood, self-image, and beliefs; not all of those events are pleasant. We often find ourselves struggling to keep our head above the water, searching for our purpose and clawing at anything that will stop us from being engulfed in the negativities that we face daily. We’ll look at those around us and make comparisons, thinking ‘they’re so perfect, and I’m not; what’s wrong with me? Why can’t I do what they do, be what they are?’ It happens to everyone, and despite the frequency of such thoughts we hardly ever stop to reassure ourselves and others that these doubts are normal, and not true. When you’ve fallen prey to the inner voice that claims you’re inadequate, remember these five things.
1. You are important to those around you.
It’s easy to think that the people you interact with every day would be better off without you, or that you don’t mean anything to them at all. You might think that you simply blend into the wall, and that no one would notice your absence. You’d be wrong. Every day you go about your business you’re brightening someone’s day, and you might not even know it. Yes, your friends and coworkers value your presence, but so does the barista you smile at every morning, the grocery store clerk that you chat with regularly, the secretaries at your dentist’s office. You make a huge impression on those around you with your kindness and your smile; you are an important part of so many people’s lives.
2. Everyone makes mistakes, everyone has bad days; that doesn’t make you a lesser person.
When we see someone, who appears composed and poised, it’s natural to compare who they are to who we are. You may think that they’re perfect, and have no troubles and no flaws. But that’s not the case. We’re all human; we all feel, we all make mistakes. No one is incapable of screwing up, even if they look put together. So, you feel like a hot mess sometimes; that doesn’t mean you’re always a hot mess. What’s important is that you take everything one day at a time, and allow yourself to forgive your own imperfections.
3. Beauty is so much more than skin deep.
We would all love to look amazing, like the celebrities we see on magazine covers and on red carpet premiers, and there’s nothing wrong with that! Everyone should look however makes them feel fierce and on top of the world, but
not meeting society’s expectations doesn’t mean you aren’t beautiful. You might look at yourself and see nothing but flaws, ways you’re not beautiful. But beauty is how you feel about yourself, how you carry yourself, and how you treat others. Often, someone who is true to themselves radiates more beauty than they could ever fathom. Whether you believe it or not, those around you think you’re absolutely wonderful by just being you; there’s no beat yourself up over not fitting into a category of appearance.
4. Your potential is endless.
You were made do to whatever the hell it is that you want to do.
Don’t let anyone stop you, including yourself. You might think you can’t
accomplish your dreams, that you’re not capable of achieving the goals you want
to set. But you can do anything you set your mind to; climb that mountain, be
it metaphorically or literally. Anyone who tells you that you can’t do something is negative and wrong,
and honestly doesn’t deserve to be in your life. It might seem daunting, and
you might not believe in yourself, but there will always be someone who does, who will push you and encourage
you to be dazzling; let them! Always remember that the only thing holding you
back is your own doubt.
5. Feeling the way that you do is okay, and you aren’t alone while you face it.
Despite all of this, it’s okay to
feel insecure or inadequate. It’s okay to feel like you’re not who you want to
be or who you should be. I know I’ve just listed reasons to not feel this way,
but we all know that just because we know we shouldn’t feel something doesn’t mean we won’t feel it. It’s alright if you can’t find the strength right
now to reverse your current thoughts about yourself; the people in your life that matter will love you anyway. They’ll
be there to support you, to guide you through the tough times. They’ll be your
champions, your cheerleaders, your biggest fans. They’ll be with you every day to
show you your greatness until you can
see yourself in a different light, and every day after that. Part of being
human is self-doubt, and just as it doesn’t make you any less human, it doesn’t
make you any less worthy of love and support. Always know that no matter what you
are loved and treasured, and one day things will change for the better. But
until then, feeling as you do is totally alright.